A scenario: I am in the video game section of a Major Consumer Electronics Retailer (MCER), the week before Christmas. I've just escaped a conversation with an employee about the killer games of this year by feigning ignorance of games that I have played and I feel scummy about it. He approached me while I was looking at strategy guides - not exactly the act of a savvy gamer who is aware of GameFAQS. He was friendly and enthusiastic and were I in his position I would have assumed someone looking at strategy guides was about to make a bad purchase. I would have wanted to help them out.

After agreeing to let him know if I have any questions, I begin to browse the PSP titles. Every few months I take stock of the Sony platforms' offerings, weighing whether or not it's worth it to me to buy a PSP or PS3. Even though I don't have either, I'm pretty sure I'm better off than the middle-aged couple standing next to me, blanked and overwhelmed by the cases in front of them. They don't speak the language of box art. The man hunkers down, determined to decipher the glyphs along the bottom shelf. The woman -

"Excuse me, sir?" A screeching train-of-thought halt. "Do you have a PSP?"

"Uh, actually, no, I don't. I'm thinking about getting one, though," I say to the woman.

"Oh. Our son bought one for his son, and we were hoping -" she trails off. This poor kid could only get a couple games a year, and his grandparents are going to buy him - well, I don't know what. I'm not familiar enough with the PSP library to name its most disappointing title.

Maybe I can help this kid out, though. Use my general game knowledge and experience with evaluating games and act as a guide for these well-meaning folks. Ask them what their grandson likes and doesn't like, and help them find something he will enjoy. And this is better than reviewing games online because, hey, no anonymous backlash!

"I know a little bit about it, though," I say. "What was your question?" I am champion of the absent gamer; preventer of disappointed children, confused grandparents, and strained family relations. The kid will open the game and see his grandparents in a whole new light, he'll respect them and get to know them as people and his life will be richer for it. I am going to save Christmas (pardon my Catholo-centricism). The woman pulls a random title off the shelf. I am ready to advise.

"Is this a game or a movie?"

"That's a game," I say, imagining what Locoroco: The Movie would be like. I point to a lower shelf. "From Click over are the movies. Everything else is a game."

She smiles and turns to her husband. "See, it's what I thought." She thanks me and they walk away empty-handed.

In the library profession, we have training in what is called "reader advisory". It's a self-explanatory term - someone asks you what they should read, and you make some suggestions. You have a conversation with the person, you find out about what they like and don't like and, more importantly, you find out why. This is where one-on-one recommendations have an advantage over the breadth of content that algorithm's like Amazon's can offer - they suggest things based on the patterns of other people's purchases, but not on the motivations behind them. For example, my interest in strategy guides is as novelizations of playing a game - they're sort of telling you the story of playing the game (as opposed to a game novelization, which tells the story of the game). And if there's one thing I like, it's complicating the idea of a game's narrative.

I've got a reputation amongst my coworkers as knowing a little bit about video games (if only they knew) and have been asked in the past to recommend games for their kids. One purchased a Wii for her daughters (aged 8, 14, and 16) and wanted some ideas. She had heard Carnival Games was good, and it looked like something her eight year old would like. What do you suggest? Mario? Animal Crossing? Dead Space: Extraction (Well, I guess that's out since it's rated M)?

Do you just recreate your own gaming history, suggest some Virtual Console games, some WiiWare games? It's not like there's one game that's going to appeal to everyone. Wouldn't want there to be one - that would make for a very boring medium, and a very, very boring audience.