LUKE MCKINNEY
COMMUNITY WRITER
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Life's a game and I'm the bonus level.
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Want to get paid to write about games? Read this advice from someone who did it.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010 | Comments (13)
POST BY THIS AUTHOR (21)
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Tim Schafer with an axe, Chun-Li vs Forrest Law, killing Gears of War and drunk-driving around Panau.
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What does ODST really offer?
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Studying the correlation between the different Street Fighter games and the size of the bosses\' balls.
COMMENTS BY THIS AUTHOR (90)
"Let's see if they've finally created a game mode where five damn Kens isn't automatically the best team. If it saves records of the matches, which it must, it'll be a great way to be terrified of your locals:

Ken, Akuma, Sagat, Akuma, Ken: I'M CHEAP!

Chun-Li, Cammy, Jury, Sakura, Rose: I'm a bit creepy!  (Most are fine characters, but months of play has revealed to me that the only reason anyone could possibly use Cammy is her intro camera angle.)"

Wednesday, March 09, 2011
"I'm saying something nice here to mercenarily ensure we get features like this for every event you attend. "
Wednesday, March 09, 2011
"A visual theme is far more enjoyable than pure realism, and not just because Brett wrongly believes that computers will never outpace cinema (meaning he either has too little faith in hardware progress, or too much faith in an industry where Keanu Reeves is paid millions of dollars.)  The quest for realism has created a thousand gritty brown shooters and I only bought one.  Not even the sequels to that one, just that one.

Brand-new visual styles reach out and grab you: the cartoony TF2, the truly glorious shine of Mirror's Edge, the art of Okami, the cel-shading comic aciton of Viewtiful Joe, and too many more to count.  Inventive art isn't an exclusively indie province!  When I see something so new in any direction I have to try it, and while that attitude's not limited to art that is the first thing I'll see when searching for something to buy."

Thursday, October 14, 2010
"The problem with creating an "ordinary scary" as you describe is that it requires the player to be equally helpless, which is fine for atmosphere but terrible for entertainment.  One demented everyman with a knife can easily destroy a real life, and that's the scariest thing ever to exist, but every game character in existence has "Press A to Just Kill That Guy."

Take that away to create the feeling of helplessness and you haven't created an atmosphere of vulnerable horror, you've created a "Playing as the stupid sidekick level" - and gamers hate those."

Thursday, October 14, 2010
"I've not only boosted and commented, I can guarantee maximum enjoyment of the prize* - my beautiful wife bought me Crackdown 2 for my birthday, and I'm only just about to have spare time to play it.  Because DLC can zombify a finished game, artificially extending its corpse for a short stumbling time, but extra toys on the first play through?  AKA "The game the way it should have been to start with?"  Oh yes!

*Not that this affects anything but random chance, but I'm damned if I'll ever write a zero-content comment."

Monday, September 06, 2010
"I'll argue with anyone who dislikes the RE movies - they're good by action movie standards, making them incredible by videogame standards.  I just this week watched them all in a marathon for an article, and I was surprised at how well they worked.  I would recommend every other videogame movie to follow this example: focus on a few core characters (vital for a the movie to work) while throwing in as many unobtrusive game references as you like (keeping the gaming crowd happy.)  The locked weapons cabinet at the start of the first movie was priceless.

It also understands the art of sequelization far better than the games did: you have to keep raising the stakes instead of just complicating them.  And anyone upset that they ignored the RE game plot, well, they don't realise that "RE game plot" is an oxymoron.  "

Sunday, September 05, 2010
"First: shame for not taking on the true mind-breaking horror of Sewer Shark.

Second: Kriss Kross and Power Factory are just generically terrible music-editing games. It doesn't matter how much they suck, after a few minutes most of your mind goes into protective shutdown.  I demand Wirehead, whose attempts at narrative will force your brain to pay attention to the agony!"

Wednesday, July 28, 2010
"I'll still support Bison over Seth any day of the week - at least he kicks your ass with his own moves, and even on the scale of  "Stupid SF Bosses Who Aren't Seth," he's no Gill either."
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
"This is a real compliment - a fellow Bitmobber not only liking my material but writing an article about it (thus saving me the dilemma of "Wanting to tell them but not wanting to look like I was plugging")

Cheers Mark, showing up on your weekly radar-sweep of the videogaming spectrum is cool!"

Sunday, July 11, 2010
"A Steam sale of Defense Grid took me from Hell to Heaven - the hell of an insomniac night without enough mental energy for higher functions, the heaven a return to the old days of purely perfect Tower Defense.  Which isn't normally capitalized, but for Defense Grid I'll capitalize every word and dot every i with a bowl of raspberries.

A Steam code would bring me back there for a while."

Tuesday, July 06, 2010
"Best Attempt To Travel Through Time:  Sony and Microsoft, unveiling motion controls a mere four years after Nintendo sold them to all the casual gamers who'd care.  What's that?  Why, yes, those *are* the casual gamers who by definition wouldn't buy a second product.

Best Joy Derived From Undeserved Source: The return of Kid Icarus.  Yes, we've been waiting years for this!  It's going to be fantastic!  Has anyone actually played the original since!  Oh god I'm going around in circles in this bloody grid of a maze again!  GOD DAMN YOU GAME I'M AN EGGPLANT AND THEREFORE BUGGERED!"

Monday, June 21, 2010
"What most people miss is that there's an inverse relationship: they keep making terrible movies out of great games, but the one time they used a truly terrible game - Onechanbara, a collection of the worst videogame flaws from five years ago somehow re-released in the present - the movie was a million times better than the subject material.  We just need to base movies on awful games and we're set: Dead or Alive Paradise (actually, I think that's already been made on pay-per-view), Tony Hawk Ride already exists on top-rated youtube videos of stupid skateboarders breaking themselves, a Bionic Commando action movie  would be Iron Man + Commando = Best Thing, the possibilities are endless."
Sunday, June 06, 2010