Update: And she's gone... I wrote this piece a few hours after I learned my friend Rannie had received a terminal diagnosis after a long bout with cancer. She passed away six days later, but not before she could marry her longtime boyfriend, David.
I can only imagine the pain he feels after losing his bride of just four days. While there's nothing I can do to lessen her husband's loss, I am once again reminded to be thankful for what I have in life.
Because of her condition, this article was as close as I was able to come to saying goodbye. It's hardly fitting of such a great person, but I'm hopeful her husband was able to pass along my message in the final paragraph.
If you've been moved at all by this piece or you simply want to brighten someone's day, please make a donation to the wonderful Child's Play charity in memory of Rannie Reid or whomever else you'd like to honor.
Thank you for reading.
If you’ve been following my Tweets as I play through Uncharted 2, you already know that I don’t particularly like the game. Not only do I not like it, but I can’t fathom how it currently has a 97 score at Metacritic.
Not one of the 75 people who have reviewed the game has given it less than a 9.0. Nobody in the entire industry seems to think that the game is anything less than stellar. It makes me furious that not one person has registered a dissenting opinion on the game -- I’m legitimately upset by this.
I’m an idiot -- a complete moron.
I have a friend who has been battling cancer for well over a year. While I’m experiencing "real" emotion over the gaming media and the way it handles reviews, this friend of mine has to cope with one of the scariest things in the world.
I spent this morning pissed-off that I had to press a button to pick up ammo in Uncharted 2.
This amazing woman beat cancer -- and when I say she “beat” it, I mean that she fought. She went through radiation, chemo, and reconstructive surgery. Once the cancer was gone, her weakened immune system left her susceptible to illness, which made her recovery even more difficult.
I complained most of this weekend that Uncharted 2 is nothing more than Tomb Raider with a male protagonist.
My friend and I were supposed to go to the zoo 2 months ago. She was too weak to walk for very long, but we made arrangements to get a wheelchair for her. The day that we were supposed to go, she canceled because she wasn’t feeling well.
I’m furious with the gaming media because I don’t believe anyone out there is brave enough to say that they didn’t love the game.
My friend found out that her cancer came back a month ago. She was tired, and she was annoyed that it was back for more, but she was ready to fight again. We had to delay our “victory pizza” dinner until she beat this awful disease and I found a job.
I spent a perfectly good Friday night on Twitter to share my “important” thoughts on this season’s “biggest” game.
This morning I received an e-mail telling me my friend’s cancer had just been diagnosed as terminal. I’m bellyaching about a video game, and she now spends most of her time sleeping because she’s too weak to do anything else -- she can’t even eat anymore. Her boyfriend and her family are taking care of her, but she’ll soon have to move to a hospice center. Let’s just say that you typically don’t make plans to come home from a hospice center....
This morning I spent 30 minutes arguing with a former GameSpot coworker that Uncharted 2 doesn't really have a very good story.
I’ve written this article to remind myself just what is -- and isn’t -- important in this world. It turns out that video games aren’t all that important. Arguing whether or not a game or a console is good or not... everyone’s life should be so amazing that they have time to worry about such petty and trivial matters.
To my friend: I’m sorry that I wasted some of the most precious commodity in the world -- time -- upset because I didn’t like a video game as much as somebody else. I’d do anything to get those moments back and give them to you so that you could spend just a few more minutes with your family and the ones you love. You’re truly an inspiration, and I will always admire your fight.
You never stopped believing in me, and I’ll never stop believing in you.
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Comments (61)
Yeah...
I want to say more, but I really have got nothing. I just wanted to acknowledge that I read your post. I am moved, though, by your taking the time out to lament aloud about the things that truly matter. The gaming thing, for me at least, is a nice diversion, and I make a few bucks here and there reviewing games. But Love, family and friendship are, of course, what this dance is all about.
I want to say more, but I really have got nothing. I just wanted to acknowledge that I read your post. I am moved, though, by your taking the time out to lament aloud about the things that truly matter. The gaming thing, for me at least, is a nice diversion, and I make a few bucks here and there reviewing games. But Love, family and friendship are, of course, what this dance is all about.
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October 19, 2009
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Thanks Tony. It is a diversion, but sometimes I get caught up in it and treat it as if it's so much more. I've gotten better about doing this, but sometimes I just lose focus on what's important. I'm not proud of it, but I thought I'd share.
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October 19, 2009
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I just registered on bitmob here for the first time to comment on this. That's a great peice of writing. I'm very sorry for your friend. I feel so fortunate that I haven't been closed to anyone who has suffered from such a draining problem such as cancer. The tought of how lucky I am sends shivers down me with the tought that such luck won't last forever.
I'm also sorry for you, sorry you weren't able to enjoy one of the best games of the year... Well not really, each to their own.
I'm also sorry for you, sorry you weren't able to enjoy one of the best games of the year... Well not really, each to their own.
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October 19, 2009
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My god,that piece was a real eye opener. the way it was put together was generally moving, with the comments about the game looking as insignificant as they should be next to the tragedy of cancer itself. So sorry to hear about your friend. dont really know what else to say....
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October 19, 2009
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Sorry about your friend Aaron... Cancer is brutal, so it's admirable that your friend has hung in there for so long.
You make a good point that arguing about video games (or something of a similar nature) really isn't all that important. I wouldn't say that it's bad, it's just not as important as some other things in this world.
You make a good point that arguing about video games (or something of a similar nature) really isn't all that important. I wouldn't say that it's bad, it's just not as important as some other things in this world.
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October 19, 2009
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You're kinda crazy comparing this game to Tomb Raider. Not even close.
Our hearts go out to Rannie.
Our hearts go out to Rannie.
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October 19, 2009
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Well said sir, I hope alot of those who frequent gaming message boards and review comments sections calling bloody murder about reviews or what have you. It angers me when I see posts/comments that act as if the fact some game got a 7 is the worst thing to ever happen in the world, alot of gamers (especially on the internet) really do need some perspective.
I'm deeply sorry to hear about your friend I know it isn't easy but thanks for sharing.
I'm deeply sorry to hear about your friend I know it isn't easy but thanks for sharing.
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October 19, 2009
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@Roman - I don't know why I got so angry over this. Trust me, I don't miss any sort of controversy. I'm not defending my emotions regarding the coverage this game is getting, at all. I'm saying my reaction is stupid.
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October 19, 2009
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This piece is about keeping life in perspective. We get mad at little things -- just today I was ranting about the way Chase continues to muck up the Washington Mutual purchase -- but really, how does that measure up to someone dying? To someone not having food and shelter? To someone losing their home because they lost their job because some traders in New York found a new way to make millions? To the person that's sick and isn't getting better because they don't have access to health insurance -- or are denied because they got sick?
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October 19, 2009
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Cancer is a difficult thing. Death is a one shot deal- it's sad and then things, for better or worse, start to go back to normal for those left among the living. Terminal illness makes your loved ones contemplate death and the associated emotions every day.
I'm sure calling it 'cold comfort' is the understatement of the year, but I'm sorry for you and your friend. Hang in there.
I'm sure calling it 'cold comfort' is the understatement of the year, but I'm sorry for you and your friend. Hang in there.
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October 19, 2009
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How anyone who reads this article can even comment on your criticisms of Uncharted 2 is beyond me. I'm sorry to hear about this Aaron and these types of things in life that you can't prepare for.
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October 19, 2009
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Yikes dude. Sometimes we get slapped by the trout that is life. I'm sorry to hear about your friend, hospice is a very difficult place to be when you're on the supporting side of things. My thoughts and prayers go out to you, your friend, and her family.
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October 19, 2009
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@ Derek Lavigne
Because that's what in the title. I think that the misconception that people have is that the job or in this case hobby you have has nothing to do with what is gong on on the real life. I think one of the main points that this post makes is that you cannot really separate one from the other. There is nothing wrong with that. I don't believe that unbiased journalism exists so there is nothing wrong with bias be it positive or negative. But in reality Uncharted 2 has very little to do with Aaron's anger. So everyone who reads this post is either going to fixate on the opinions or the facts. In a way this article is very relevant to gaming, but it wouldn't be if everyone understood that opinions are just opinions and every person can approach the game review differently.
Because that's what in the title. I think that the misconception that people have is that the job or in this case hobby you have has nothing to do with what is gong on on the real life. I think one of the main points that this post makes is that you cannot really separate one from the other. There is nothing wrong with that. I don't believe that unbiased journalism exists so there is nothing wrong with bias be it positive or negative. But in reality Uncharted 2 has very little to do with Aaron's anger. So everyone who reads this post is either going to fixate on the opinions or the facts. In a way this article is very relevant to gaming, but it wouldn't be if everyone understood that opinions are just opinions and every person can approach the game review differently.
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October 19, 2009
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I totally get your point, and of course I agree. I don't really see why people care at all what others think of them or their opinions, but it's a very human and natural thing to do. Lots of people need to stop caring about what other people think however, and focus on the good, or just plain important, things in life. This goes for the meaningless quest of always being right in everything as well. Just stop it. Being wrong isn't equal to being stupid -- it's what being human is all about.
Sorry about your friend, Aaron.
Sorry about your friend, Aaron.
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October 19, 2009
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Thank you for this. As gamers, a lot of us tend to spend a little too much time playing games and we sometimes lose sight of what is truly precious. Thank you for reminding us to take some time to really appreciate what we have. I'm going to log off for a while and give my fiance a big hug. I wish you and your friend nothing but the best.
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October 19, 2009
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Wow this wa a very powerful and well written piece. Thank you.
The one thing I would say is to not beat yourself up over feeling that way. There is nothign wrong with arguing about somethign that you feel passionnate about. The important thing I think is that you can feel something.
99% of the population of the planet doesn't really do anything important, and everything is pretty much trivial until we are dead. Unless your working on a cure for cancer or something else major that will trully impact everyon's life its all just trivial imho. Maybe I'll look into doing something less trivial in my life.
Thanks again.
The one thing I would say is to not beat yourself up over feeling that way. There is nothign wrong with arguing about somethign that you feel passionnate about. The important thing I think is that you can feel something.
99% of the population of the planet doesn't really do anything important, and everything is pretty much trivial until we are dead. Unless your working on a cure for cancer or something else major that will trully impact everyon's life its all just trivial imho. Maybe I'll look into doing something less trivial in my life.
Thanks again.
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October 19, 2009
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Thanks for the perspective.
However, it should be pointed out that the article does include criticisms of the game. It obviously still matters to you. You should care. Will it ever be as important as time spent with loved ones -- it shouldn't be.
But, that doesn't mean we shouldn't get all the enjoyment we can get from the little things. It just means to put the little things aside often in favor of the important things.
However, it should be pointed out that the article does include criticisms of the game. It obviously still matters to you. You should care. Will it ever be as important as time spent with loved ones -- it shouldn't be.
But, that doesn't mean we shouldn't get all the enjoyment we can get from the little things. It just means to put the little things aside often in favor of the important things.
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October 19, 2009
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Thanks again for reading, everyone.
@Jeffrey - Yes, it does include those criticisms, but they're just there to show that I was arguing with people over trivial matters. Sure, I think the game is overrated, but I'm quite aware that it doesn't matter at all in the grand scheme. Play games because you love them, don't waste time on petty stuff that doesn't bring you joy.
@Jeffrey - Yes, it does include those criticisms, but they're just there to show that I was arguing with people over trivial matters. Sure, I think the game is overrated, but I'm quite aware that it doesn't matter at all in the grand scheme. Play games because you love them, don't waste time on petty stuff that doesn't bring you joy.
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October 19, 2009
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It is quite sad when people argue about games, although most people who do that are not in the situation that you are in, and can't see what it is like.
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October 19, 2009
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And also, I don't care if people don't like the same games as me, I don't say they're wrong, because they're not. Choosing a game, or a film or car that someone doesn't like doesn't mean you are wrong because you can never be wrong about something like that. I wouldn't care if you thought Uncharted 2 was the worst game ever, it is your decision.
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October 19, 2009
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@Aaron Yeah, I see that it was a device to compare the two and it works brilliantly at illustrating the absurdity of those issues with the real pain and emotion that comes with your friend's cancer.
I don't mean to be insensitive. It is just that I enjoy arguing about games (and everything else); and while it can become petty very quickly it is also a way that I spend time with friends.
I think that I am just skewing this to be about the act of arguing. When you stated clearly in the title that I shouldn't care about your feelings about the game. That is completely fair. The way you or I feel about something inanimate isn't nearly as important as the time spent with people. Sorry, if I am just rewording everything you said, but I am kinda just thinking "out loud."
Again, I am not trying to be insensitive. I am sorry about your friend. I just feel bad when I experience that sensation that I should clamp up when something bad happens, and so I tend to go overboard... as you can see.
I don't mean to be insensitive. It is just that I enjoy arguing about games (and everything else); and while it can become petty very quickly it is also a way that I spend time with friends.
I think that I am just skewing this to be about the act of arguing. When you stated clearly in the title that I shouldn't care about your feelings about the game. That is completely fair. The way you or I feel about something inanimate isn't nearly as important as the time spent with people. Sorry, if I am just rewording everything you said, but I am kinda just thinking "out loud."
Again, I am not trying to be insensitive. I am sorry about your friend. I just feel bad when I experience that sensation that I should clamp up when something bad happens, and so I tend to go overboard... as you can see.
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October 19, 2009
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I think you should grab a couple of people that are special to her, set aside some time (as much as she can handle), and, even if she can't eat, get a victory pizza anyway.
Because, to me, it doesn't sound like she failed at one goddamn thing.
Condolences man. I've lost my paternal grandmother to cervical cancer, and I almost lost my mom to the same thing.
If there be grief, then let it be but rain,
And this but silver grief for grieving's sake,
If these green woods be dreaming here to wake
Within my heart, if I should rouse again.
~William Faulkner
Make the best of your time with her. For me what really helped was trying to have as much fun as we could before my grandmother died; take it from experience, this is the worst time to keep happiness spare.
Because, to me, it doesn't sound like she failed at one goddamn thing.
Condolences man. I've lost my paternal grandmother to cervical cancer, and I almost lost my mom to the same thing.
If there be grief, then let it be but rain,
And this but silver grief for grieving's sake,
If these green woods be dreaming here to wake
Within my heart, if I should rouse again.
~William Faulkner
Make the best of your time with her. For me what really helped was trying to have as much fun as we could before my grandmother died; take it from experience, this is the worst time to keep happiness spare.
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October 19, 2009
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@James - I hope I can do that. I'd love to be able to do that for her. Hopefully there's time for that.
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October 19, 2009
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"Just as nobody cares that you don't like Uncharted 2 since you are clearly not a video game journalist,nobody cares about your personal life either because that is not what we come to these sites for."
You just completely missed the point, Luis. Not just of this post, but of this entire website.
You just completely missed the point, Luis. Not just of this post, but of this entire website.
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October 19, 2009
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Um... regardless of the drivel spouted out by Luis there, Aaron, you *are* a games journalist. Those things you mentioned in the article are *supposed* to be important to you, as it is large part of your life. If they were not important to you, you would not be very good at your job.
Of course, the importance of video games pales in comparison to that of a friend dying of cancer. But, *everything* pales in comparison to a friend dying of cancer. It is kind of a big deal, and pretty much anything compared to it will seem trivial.
In, short, try to keep things in perspective. Just because someone else is dealing with something extraordinary and life altering does not trivialize what happens in your life.
So sorry to learn about your friend. She is fighting one of the most powerful foes there is. She had victory once, so do not lose heart. I'll pour out a blot in her honor.
Of course, the importance of video games pales in comparison to that of a friend dying of cancer. But, *everything* pales in comparison to a friend dying of cancer. It is kind of a big deal, and pretty much anything compared to it will seem trivial.
In, short, try to keep things in perspective. Just because someone else is dealing with something extraordinary and life altering does not trivialize what happens in your life.
So sorry to learn about your friend. She is fighting one of the most powerful foes there is. She had victory once, so do not lose heart. I'll pour out a blot in her honor.
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October 19, 2009
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My enjoyment of Uncharted 2 probably does not come close to .01% of the happy moments you have with your friend. Sad news. My hopes and prayers.
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October 19, 2009
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I watched cancer take my grandfather as a child, he was my hero and a father to me. He was a proud strong native american man, standing 6'2" about 200lbs in December of 1984. The last time I saw him he was hunched over and weighed about 115lbs. that was April of 1985. I have been playing games since I was about 4 when I was bought an Atari 2600 I have never stopped playing games in what has amounted to 30 years of my life. I take games just as seriously as most to the point of defending them, like at the end of this life all the hours I spent doing this could have been spent building relationships or pursuing other interest. But this is my escape from all the cancers, manic depressions, bi-polar disorders that I live with on a daily basis. My mother now fights cancer and heart disease, but I will continue to play and argue about things I am passionate about. I feel your pain on a deep level, but don't give up on the little escapes.
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October 19, 2009
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I just had the pleasure of reading two articles in one hour about somebody’s friend/boyfriend who has cancer. I'm glad you wrote this if it helps you, but I don't think it helps any readers. Most of us over fourteen understand gaming is just hobby. Wish your friend the best of luck, and lets make a deal to not have any more cancer stories on gaming sites.
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October 19, 2009
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Hi Aaron,
I'm sorry to hear about your friend, and wish her the best. I can certainly relate, as my mom had a 15-year battle with cancer.
I think that you might be being a bit harsh on yourself though. As a critic, you are doing your job--and well I'd add--to express your views on Uncharted 2. Personally I think that it's great that you're expressing a dessenting opinion (I agree that the game is highly overrated!).
It's certainly understandable that this tragic situation has made you re-assess what's important in life. Of course, spending time with friends and family is more important than focusing on one's job--no matter what that job is (game-critic or anything else). If you had known that your friend was going to take a turn for the worse, clearly you would have changed your focus over the past few days, but this was impossible to predict so I think you're being too hard on yourself.
That said, I'm glad you've written blog that helps put things in perspective, for both gamers and critics alike. All the best.
I'm sorry to hear about your friend, and wish her the best. I can certainly relate, as my mom had a 15-year battle with cancer.
I think that you might be being a bit harsh on yourself though. As a critic, you are doing your job--and well I'd add--to express your views on Uncharted 2. Personally I think that it's great that you're expressing a dessenting opinion (I agree that the game is highly overrated!).
It's certainly understandable that this tragic situation has made you re-assess what's important in life. Of course, spending time with friends and family is more important than focusing on one's job--no matter what that job is (game-critic or anything else). If you had known that your friend was going to take a turn for the worse, clearly you would have changed your focus over the past few days, but this was impossible to predict so I think you're being too hard on yourself.
That said, I'm glad you've written blog that helps put things in perspective, for both gamers and critics alike. All the best.
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October 19, 2009
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@Alejo Thanks for your comment. Sorry for your loss. I wrote the article because it's how I was feeling at the time. If one person finds it inspiring then that's more useful than anything else I probably would have written.
@Noah - You're 100% right. What I'm saying is pretty obvious, but it's all-too-easy to lose perspective. I've never been told that a friend has a terminal disease before, and my reaction to that news was that I had been very focused on unimportant things this weekend.
Thanks again to everyone for taking the time to read the article. I know I could have expressed myself a little better, but this is the real emotion I was feeling this morning. I make no claim that this is the "right" way to deal with anything, or that anyone else out there is doing anything "wrong" with the way they approach life and games.
@Noah - You're 100% right. What I'm saying is pretty obvious, but it's all-too-easy to lose perspective. I've never been told that a friend has a terminal disease before, and my reaction to that news was that I had been very focused on unimportant things this weekend.
Thanks again to everyone for taking the time to read the article. I know I could have expressed myself a little better, but this is the real emotion I was feeling this morning. I make no claim that this is the "right" way to deal with anything, or that anyone else out there is doing anything "wrong" with the way they approach life and games.
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October 19, 2009
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Sorry about your friend. Being more or less friendless, not sure I can appreciate what you are feeling, but I certainly do hope you will sit with her soon and talk to her about what you wrote and more importantly WHY you wrote it (that is if you have not already done so).
Tony
Tony
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October 19, 2009
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This is a really touching blog, Aaron. I know you probably know this already, but there's no need to pay attention to the insensitive trolls here. They're just trying get a rise out of you. This was a very personal, very beautiful blog, and if there's any such thing as a professional games journalist, you sir, are it.
Keep up the good work, as posts like this are why I love Bitmob.
As I don't know a whole lot about cancer, I don't know what your friends chances are (the way you put it it doesn't sound good)... but regardless, I hope the rest of her days, no matter how many there are, are the happiest and most peaceful as possible.
Keep up the good work, as posts like this are why I love Bitmob.
As I don't know a whole lot about cancer, I don't know what your friends chances are (the way you put it it doesn't sound good)... but regardless, I hope the rest of her days, no matter how many there are, are the happiest and most peaceful as possible.
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October 19, 2009
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Let me start by saying I'm really sorry to hear about your friend.
Perspective on this whole thing is really important. I just finished recording a podcast with the usual group I record with and argued the same thing you did: why everyone thinks Uncharted 2 is the second coming. I have some really serious issues with the game. But the passion which we both brought to the argument is kind of silly in the grand scheme of things. There are things more important in life than video games (and certainly more important that metacritic).
However, I think not being able to say "I don't like this" among a crowd that's fawning over ever morsel this game dishes out, that it is utterly verboten, is insane. I could write an entire article around it. In fact, someone else did! I remember reading such an article regarding Fallout 3 and this person's post-script after the hysteria had died down (the author's name escapes me). It had, essentially, the same point: when everyone is saying one thing, the dissenter, the person with a conflicting opinion (even a valid one), gets drowned out.
Perspective on this whole thing is really important. I just finished recording a podcast with the usual group I record with and argued the same thing you did: why everyone thinks Uncharted 2 is the second coming. I have some really serious issues with the game. But the passion which we both brought to the argument is kind of silly in the grand scheme of things. There are things more important in life than video games (and certainly more important that metacritic).
However, I think not being able to say "I don't like this" among a crowd that's fawning over ever morsel this game dishes out, that it is utterly verboten, is insane. I could write an entire article around it. In fact, someone else did! I remember reading such an article regarding Fallout 3 and this person's post-script after the hysteria had died down (the author's name escapes me). It had, essentially, the same point: when everyone is saying one thing, the dissenter, the person with a conflicting opinion (even a valid one), gets drowned out.
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October 19, 2009
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Oh god Aaron. We were supposed to cook Japanese curry together after Rannie got better and could stomach spices again. I still find it hard to keep composure after today's morning email. After reading your article, it made my heart ache even more- to actually sense that pain and turmoil through your words. Let the haters and ignoramuses think all they want, I know you wrote this piece as part of a coping mechanism- something I'm desperately trying to come to terms with as well.
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October 20, 2009
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Great article.
I have a close friend who is currently battling cancer. 35 and two boys of the age of 1,5 and 3. But she keeps on battling, for the sake of herself, her kids, her brother. Last Thursday it was diagnosed that the cancer has spread to her brains. It currently affects her daily life as in forgetting simple things as 'how to put a shopping cart back' while more complex things writing in Facebook is still manageable.
In the light of life and death most things become trivial. Why worry is the tought that occurs. I and my partner discussed a lot about the situation. Instead of becoming apathetic to 'things' we decided to go with the flow. The flow of life. Life to the fullest, enjoy each other, enjoy about anything. Worry less. And do things which are important. And do things which we/I enjoy such as gaming.
I have a close friend who is currently battling cancer. 35 and two boys of the age of 1,5 and 3. But she keeps on battling, for the sake of herself, her kids, her brother. Last Thursday it was diagnosed that the cancer has spread to her brains. It currently affects her daily life as in forgetting simple things as 'how to put a shopping cart back' while more complex things writing in Facebook is still manageable.
In the light of life and death most things become trivial. Why worry is the tought that occurs. I and my partner discussed a lot about the situation. Instead of becoming apathetic to 'things' we decided to go with the flow. The flow of life. Life to the fullest, enjoy each other, enjoy about anything. Worry less. And do things which are important. And do things which we/I enjoy such as gaming.
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October 20, 2009
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Well, you'd pretty much have to be an automated spam protocol not to be moved by Thomas' description of the cancer-suffering friend.
That said, this post is problematic in the same way as all "there are more important things in life" arguments are. It might seem like a no-brainer to say that friendship and human suffering means more than video games, but if we take a closer look at the logic at display here we're basically saying that problem X (in this case, opinions about Uncharted 2) is trivial if and when we can find a problem Y (friend with cancer) which happens to be so much worse. This might make for emotionally evocative posts such as this, but I believe this general way of thinking easily leads us to logical extremes which we are in fact not prepared to accept.
After all, if this comparative method really is our standard we might as well say that a single person's suffering from cancer is virtually insignificant to us compared to the plight of thousands of people who die of starvation every day. While there are indeed intelligent and morally impeccible persons out there who whould argue that we should in fact think and feel in this way, most of us would say that context matters a great deal. Thus, world starvation could legitimately be said to be less important to our personal lives than a suffering friend is, while at the same time acknowledging that the plight of starving children is (or ought to be) a top priority on our political agenda.
Likewise, one should be able to make distinctions within the realm of one's personal life by (for example) admitting that being a lone dissenter about the quality of a video game really is a big deal if and when it concerns one of our foremost hobbies which we have felt passionately about for years and are bound to have strong and deep-rooted opinions about - regardless of whether in our social lives we're at the same time also going through a period characterized by intense suffering, grief, love or any other strong emotions.
At the end of the day I'm not necessarily hostile to the idea that a friend's terminal illness is objectively more important than video games, but I think it's useful to call attention to the danger of belittling various emotions, conflicts, hardships and disagreements by simply comparing them to problems which just happen to be bigger.
That said, this post is problematic in the same way as all "there are more important things in life" arguments are. It might seem like a no-brainer to say that friendship and human suffering means more than video games, but if we take a closer look at the logic at display here we're basically saying that problem X (in this case, opinions about Uncharted 2) is trivial if and when we can find a problem Y (friend with cancer) which happens to be so much worse. This might make for emotionally evocative posts such as this, but I believe this general way of thinking easily leads us to logical extremes which we are in fact not prepared to accept.
After all, if this comparative method really is our standard we might as well say that a single person's suffering from cancer is virtually insignificant to us compared to the plight of thousands of people who die of starvation every day. While there are indeed intelligent and morally impeccible persons out there who whould argue that we should in fact think and feel in this way, most of us would say that context matters a great deal. Thus, world starvation could legitimately be said to be less important to our personal lives than a suffering friend is, while at the same time acknowledging that the plight of starving children is (or ought to be) a top priority on our political agenda.
Likewise, one should be able to make distinctions within the realm of one's personal life by (for example) admitting that being a lone dissenter about the quality of a video game really is a big deal if and when it concerns one of our foremost hobbies which we have felt passionately about for years and are bound to have strong and deep-rooted opinions about - regardless of whether in our social lives we're at the same time also going through a period characterized by intense suffering, grief, love or any other strong emotions.
At the end of the day I'm not necessarily hostile to the idea that a friend's terminal illness is objectively more important than video games, but I think it's useful to call attention to the danger of belittling various emotions, conflicts, hardships and disagreements by simply comparing them to problems which just happen to be bigger.
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October 20, 2009
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I'm wondering how many people read this title and had their claws out, but shamefully drew them back in once reading the full story?
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October 20, 2009
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"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."
John 3:16
This is verse is all I have to give to you and your friend Aaron, its the most I could give to you and your friend. Cancer is a horrible thing, October 31st 2008 I lost my friend to leukemia, I didn't know the word of God then so I couldn't give him anything.
John 3:16
This is verse is all I have to give to you and your friend Aaron, its the most I could give to you and your friend. Cancer is a horrible thing, October 31st 2008 I lost my friend to leukemia, I didn't know the word of God then so I couldn't give him anything.
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October 20, 2009
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Aaron,
I see where you're coming from with this article, I lost an uncle to lung cancer but it seems like you're beating yourself up because of your hobby. Comparing anything to someone with a terminal illness can make what ever you're doing feel useless and not matter but how is it different from any other hobby.
Is football somehow better than videogames? No. Its just what people like over the other. From what I got from this article you are beating yourself up because you think that arguing about a videogame is pointless compared to your friends stuggle. But anything will seem pointless compared to that. You shouldn't beat yourself up over something you like just because someone is in a worse state that you. I'm not saying that you shouldn't feel bad for them but putting yourself down isn't going to help any either.
(Hopefully this makes sence lol)
I see where you're coming from with this article, I lost an uncle to lung cancer but it seems like you're beating yourself up because of your hobby. Comparing anything to someone with a terminal illness can make what ever you're doing feel useless and not matter but how is it different from any other hobby.
Is football somehow better than videogames? No. Its just what people like over the other. From what I got from this article you are beating yourself up because you think that arguing about a videogame is pointless compared to your friends stuggle. But anything will seem pointless compared to that. You shouldn't beat yourself up over something you like just because someone is in a worse state that you. I'm not saying that you shouldn't feel bad for them but putting yourself down isn't going to help any either.
(Hopefully this makes sence lol)
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October 20, 2009
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Aaron - This was a great post. It was emotional and unorthodox, but you still clearly conveyed an opinion about a video game despite the rough time you are having personally. Thank you for sharing your story.
Luis - I come to Bitmob because people do interject their personal feelings in what they write here. I like to read how video games are associated with both good and bad events in people's lives. You are quite wrong about nobody caring about Aaron and his opinions. A lot of us here do care quite a bit.
Everyone else with negative comments - Demian summed up my feelings quite well when he responded to Luis. You all are missing the point of this website entirely. Aaron is a member of the staff, but that doesn't make him any less entitled to post something emotional (I would argue it even gives him more of a right to post what he wants.) Have you guys actually read more than a few articles here? It's chock full of personal stories and how video games were or were not a part of them. Before you start calling Aaron unprofessional and attacking his credibility as a journalist, remember this: you don't pay a single cent for all the great content on this website. He doesn't owe any of you a damn thing. If you don't like it, feel free to not read it or find another community to (not) be a part of.
Luis - I come to Bitmob because people do interject their personal feelings in what they write here. I like to read how video games are associated with both good and bad events in people's lives. You are quite wrong about nobody caring about Aaron and his opinions. A lot of us here do care quite a bit.
Everyone else with negative comments - Demian summed up my feelings quite well when he responded to Luis. You all are missing the point of this website entirely. Aaron is a member of the staff, but that doesn't make him any less entitled to post something emotional (I would argue it even gives him more of a right to post what he wants.) Have you guys actually read more than a few articles here? It's chock full of personal stories and how video games were or were not a part of them. Before you start calling Aaron unprofessional and attacking his credibility as a journalist, remember this: you don't pay a single cent for all the great content on this website. He doesn't owe any of you a damn thing. If you don't like it, feel free to not read it or find another community to (not) be a part of.
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October 20, 2009
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My God...I just found out you were talking about Rannie through Milky's tweet earlier today.
Thoughts and prayers to her and her family.
Thoughts and prayers to her and her family.
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October 20, 2009
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I feel you man. My dad died totally unexpectedly from liver cancer this july. Trust me, you're lucky that you still get time to spend with your friend. Cancer blows.
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October 20, 2009
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I'm very sorry to hear about your friend. Thanks for taking the time to share this story with all of us.
take care,
Steve
take care,
Steve
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October 20, 2009
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Hey Aaron, just stopping by to tell you what I wrote on your Gamespot blog. A very thoughtful article, and a surely worthy read for my 'time' commodity, at least. Thanks for sharing this story, and sorry about your friend, I went through something relatable with a childhood friend a few years back, it's a tough experience that I wouldn't DARE to wish for anyone at all.
All the best,
Eduardo
All the best,
Eduardo
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October 20, 2009
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Aaron,
May you find comfort in the words of your friends and family.
My condolences and thoughts are with you.
May you find comfort in the words of your friends and family.
My condolences and thoughts are with you.
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October 27, 2009
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This was one of the most beautiful pieces of video game writing out there. It perfectly capture the back and forth between staring into the void and the mundane ordinary life we must live through simultaneously. It is a fantastic tribute to a lost friend and provides stirring insight into how we make these devices called video games integral to our lives.
It may have been the greatest piece of writing relating to a video game I have ever read.
It may have been the greatest piece of writing relating to a video game I have ever read.
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October 27, 2009
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@Andrew - Wow. I don't know what to say. I appreciate the compliment.
@Christopher and Eduardo - Thank you to you both.
@Christopher and Eduardo - Thank you to you both.
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October 27, 2009
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My wife's father is currently fighting cancer so while it's impossible to ever truly know how something is affecting a fellow human being, I do vicariously feel your pain. It's a disgusting thing to have to endure and you have my empathy.
On the Uncharted thing, maybe you're right, maybe not. Is it totally impossible that everyone really does like it? I'll repost something I wrote on a forum a few hours ago which sort of sums up most of the negative comments.
1) A puzzle game. All you trolls who complain that the puzzles are too easy need to understand that you aren't Nathan. He's way smarter than you and has done his homework. He comes prepared for the task at hand. You aren't him, you are controlling him, he's done all the research, you're doing the legwork
2) Open world. All the complaints of "too linear" are moronic. Have you played video games for the last 17 years? Everything is not GTA, and thank god for that. This is an interactive movie where you play the fight scenes, it's not GOW or Tomb Raider. It's linear because Naughty Dog WANTS IT THAT WAY.
3) Original. This IS Indiana Jones for the modern day. No it's not mind blowingly original, but it IS fantastic for what it IS. They've taken ideas from several different places and turned them into a fantastically functioning whole. If you're looking for originality go download some indie games from XBL.
I don't expect everyone to like this game, and if the things I pointed out bother you that's a totally legitimate reason for disliking it, but it IS possible for the vast majority of people to enjoy something. I feel the same way about Ocarina of Time, I've never been able to figure out why it continues to reign supreme. I liked, have played it a few times but it doesn't deserve the critical acclaim it's garnered over the years in my opinion.
But all of this, the fanboy wars, the "It's great!" "No it sucks!" fighting is, in the end, such a stupid waste of time. I've found myself ready to go to bat for something or the other many times since my father-in-law was diagnosed only to lose steam when I realize how stupidly mundane it is when he's 2000 miles away fighting for his life.
Thanks for the perspective. It goes well with a cold beer.
On the Uncharted thing, maybe you're right, maybe not. Is it totally impossible that everyone really does like it? I'll repost something I wrote on a forum a few hours ago which sort of sums up most of the negative comments.
1) A puzzle game. All you trolls who complain that the puzzles are too easy need to understand that you aren't Nathan. He's way smarter than you and has done his homework. He comes prepared for the task at hand. You aren't him, you are controlling him, he's done all the research, you're doing the legwork
2) Open world. All the complaints of "too linear" are moronic. Have you played video games for the last 17 years? Everything is not GTA, and thank god for that. This is an interactive movie where you play the fight scenes, it's not GOW or Tomb Raider. It's linear because Naughty Dog WANTS IT THAT WAY.
3) Original. This IS Indiana Jones for the modern day. No it's not mind blowingly original, but it IS fantastic for what it IS. They've taken ideas from several different places and turned them into a fantastically functioning whole. If you're looking for originality go download some indie games from XBL.
I don't expect everyone to like this game, and if the things I pointed out bother you that's a totally legitimate reason for disliking it, but it IS possible for the vast majority of people to enjoy something. I feel the same way about Ocarina of Time, I've never been able to figure out why it continues to reign supreme. I liked, have played it a few times but it doesn't deserve the critical acclaim it's garnered over the years in my opinion.
But all of this, the fanboy wars, the "It's great!" "No it sucks!" fighting is, in the end, such a stupid waste of time. I've found myself ready to go to bat for something or the other many times since my father-in-law was diagnosed only to lose steam when I realize how stupidly mundane it is when he's 2000 miles away fighting for his life.
Thanks for the perspective. It goes well with a cold beer.
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October 27, 2009
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