Dan Hsu From 1999 on Pokemon, Dreamcast, and the Xbox
Written by Aaron Thomas   

Editor's note: Normally I wouldn't write an article that's entirely focused on mocking my employer, but since I'm off honeymooning in Hawaii, I figure there's not much he can do about it. I guess Shoe could burn my house down, or fire me. I suppose he could even burn my house down AND fire me. Perhaps this article wasn't such a good idea... -Aaron


Back in the day, EGM had a segment at the end of the magazine called "Last Word." The editors would each share their opinion on a gaming related topic. Sounds kind of like the Mobcast, doesn't it?

Well, thanks to my extremely unnecessary collection of old video game magazines, I've got a few choice nuggets from Dan Hsu's participation in the Last Word circa 1999-2000. With the added benefit of hindsight, I'll analyze his stance/prediction to show the Bitmob co-founder exactly where he went wrong.

Click "read more" to learn 1999 Shoe's prediction on the Xbox's chances (or X-box, as they called it back in the day), his state of arousal over the Dreamcast launch, and his thoughts on a little fad called "Pokémon."



Shoe on: "The X-box: Future of Video Games or the Next 3DO?"

Aaron's analysis: Shoe seems to ignore the fact that the "X-box" might face its own difficult road wooing developers. Why would a developer take a risk on an Xbox game and then port it to another fledgling system, when they could simply develop it for the PS2 and not have anything to worry about?

I suppose Shoe's theory did result in people getting Shenmue 2 and Crazy Taxi after the Dreamcast croaked, but I don't think that's what Dan or Sega was banking on.


Shoe on: "Pokémon: So... Do You Get it?"

Aaron's analysis: At last count, those "glassy-eyed little Japanese freaks" had sold over 186 MILLION games, spawned 12 movies, a hit TV show, and a still-successful card game. I'm not saying Shoe was out of touch with the youth of the time, but...

On the other hand, if Japan had someone like Dan watching out for them, they might have avoided this incident where an episode of the cartoon caused 685 people to have seizures when it aired. Thanks, Dan!


Shoe on: "Buying Consoles the Day They Come Out."

Aaron's analysis: Shoe might have had hard nipples, but he also had a hard time predicting the venom people had for Sega after the less-than-successful Sega CD, 32X, and Saturn. I adored the Dreamcast, but I had many friends who swore they wouldn't be burned by Sega again.

I'd write more, but I can't stop thinking of Shoe and his Dreamcast-induced hard nipples.

This article was a complete mistake!

Comments (23)

That last quote nearly made me do a spit-take! Apparently Shoe's nipples are to console launches as an old-timer's bum knee is to an approaching storm.
Brett Bates , November 12, 2009
Aaron, please come see me after you get back from your vacation.
Dan Hsu , November 12, 2009
Great picture of Shoe there.
Kai Su , November 12, 2009
@Dan we like the Glassey eyed-ed little freaks
Toby Davis , November 12, 2009
Wow you can't get this sort of goodness from any other site.

Absolute brilliance.

@Shoe, is that a Glamour Shot?
Keith Schloemer , November 12, 2009
This was great! Dreamcast-induced nipples was an epidemic back in '99!!!
Lance Darnell , November 12, 2009
Wow, just...wow. And the picture just wraps up the package so nicely. Although really, all of the editors pictures look like they were done at a Sears studio back then: oh the 90's...
Mark T. Whitney , November 12, 2009
smilies/cheesy.gif Hilarious!

@Aaron Enjoy the rest of your honeymoon before...
Marco Gutierrez , November 12, 2009
I can drag out the acid-tripped versions of the old staff photos!
Tom Heistuman , November 12, 2009
I'm not reading any of your comments, FYI!
Dan Hsu , November 12, 2009
Anybody care to comment on the irony of the Pokémon obsession versus Hsu's Achievement obsession? smilies/cheesy.gif
Alejandro Moreno , November 12, 2009
Lmao i want to see the whole crew in tye dye shirts next lol.... aah the 90s good times
Keith Ohara , November 12, 2009
Wow, I also wonder if Shoe thought that Limp Bizkit would be the new Nirvana?
Joseph Holmes , November 12, 2009
Shoe's nipples are so hard he can cut glass with them.
Rich McGrath , November 12, 2009
Oh man, ha ha! That was great.

What website will you be moving to, Aaron? I'd like to keep in touch.
J. Cosmo Cohen , November 12, 2009
I'd write more, but I can't stop thinking of Shoe and his Dreamcast-induced hard nipples.


STUPID SEXY SHOE!!!
Ryan A. Rubis , November 12, 2009
Can a person really have differnt degrees of "nipple hardness"?
Thanks, Aaron, for reminding me when Shoe was the noob and how his advice screwed me. A million and one games my ass.
Joshua McCluskey , November 12, 2009
Thinking of Shoe's hard nipples is making my nipples hard. It's a vicious cycle.
Hope the honeymoon is going well.
Travis McReynolds , November 13, 2009
That pic of shoe kinda looks like he is squirl carrying acorns (get your mind out of the gutters) in his cheeks.
Jason Galm , November 13, 2009
I love looking back at old EGM issues, especially for these kinds of predictions. You should take a look at the Nintendo buying Sega one next, Aaron.
Brian Shirk , November 14, 2009
Hey, we can't all be right all the time. Just goes to show no one really knows whats going to happen sometimes...Man this article takes me back. I used to have a huge stack of old EGMs, Gamepros, and does anybody remember Gamefan?

Is it strange that I remember some of my favorite issues? My favorite EGM of all time had lengthy previews for both Goldeneye 64 and Final Fantasy VII. I used to read it cover to cover all the time.
Evan Campbell , November 15, 2009
@Evan Gamefan was tight. My first introduction to true import news (near the back, where you could order import games!) and I loved it. I think everyone who reads a magazine for many years will be bound to have favorite issues. I still have all my old EGMs in boxes in my living room. My faves were the issue 100/200 game list ones and most of the April issues, trying to find the April Fools stories.
Tom Heistuman , November 15, 2009
lol I love EGM so much, those were the days! If we are pulling out old pics, you gotta show the one of Shawn, Shoe and Crispin dressed up like elves from that Xmas EGM
Matt Swain , November 16, 2009

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