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Mario Paint was an interesting title for the Super Nintendo. It wasn't so much a game as it was a creativity tool. It shipped with a mouse (Yep, the SNES had an official mouse), which was used in conjunction with a rudimentary MS Paint-like program to create (in my case) not-so-beautiful works of art. There was also a minigame in which you'd use the mouse to control a fly swatter and swat flies, though I'm not sure where that fits in with the whole "art" concept of the game.

Here's a video of someone using Mario Paint that will give you a good idea of what it was like. You don't really need to watch the whole thing, but skip around a bit to see some of the different modes.

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You gotta hand it to the folks over at casual gaming publisher PopCap. They, like us last week, have noticed the insanely amusing Evony ads popping up around the Internet and managed to brilliantly poke fun at them. And when we say we gotta hand it to them, we mean with two hands. Preferably in a cupped position.

Cultural Blips:

• Plants vs. Zombies ad heavy on melons. We didn't want to play this game before, but we'd be total boobs to ignore zombie boobs. [Offworld]

• Samuari Mario excels at Bowser-slaying, sucks at fixing clogged crappers. Here is what a classic Mario vs. Bowser battle would look like if it took place in feudal Japan. Minus the random dinosaur, of course. [Super Punch]

Click for full version

• Mega Man timeline keeps on ticking. A community member over at Destructoid made this timeline showcasing every Mega Man title released by year. Only one game for 2009? Lazy, Capcom. Really lazy. [Destructoid]

• Recession Mario contemplates life-changing jump. Looks like times are tough in Mushroom Kingdom, too. You'd think Mario would have invested his coins better. Guess that's what happens when you're addicted to mushrooms. [TinyCartridge]

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Editor's note: In the console wars, everyone's a loser -- I think Matthew's preaching to the choir on that point. But it's still interesting to read his experiences growing up in the DMZ between diehard Sega and Nintendo forces, as they battled for fanboy supremacy in British schoolyards. -Demian

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When I was about 12, I was negotiating to buy my friend Ben's Nintendo Game Boy. There was a debate over money, which games would be included, whether he was going to throw in his set of accessories, but the final deal was to be decided upon at another friend's birthday party.

Ben brought the goods with him and let me have a good go on the machine, way longer than the couple of minutes he'd usually allow. He sat beside me, the salesman in him telling me what I already knew: Tetris was amazing, Super Mario Land was great, Chase HQ was as good as it was in arcades (actually he was lying through his fucking teeth about that one). The pitch wasn't necessary; I'd spent enough time pouring over articles and pictures of the Game Boy in magazines like Total! and Computer and Video Games to know that I wanted one, desperately....

Then into the party walked James with his Sega Game Gear, all color screen, sleek black casing, and Sonic the Hedgehog -- a game designed to sway people like me from buying a Nintendo system. James was apparently done with it and was looking to sell. Decisions.

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Batman: Arkham Asylum is now less than a month away (it comes out Aug. 25), and the hype's reached unprecedented levels for a licensed comic-book game.

And for good reason.

All of the pieces of the puzzle seem to be in place. With a story by Emmy Award-winning writer (and fan-favorite comic scribe) Paul Dini, a gorgeous Unreal Engine 3 veneer, a refined stealth/combat system, and Kevin Conroy (Batman), Mark Hamill (Joker), and Arleen Sorkin (Harley Quinn) reprising the vocal roles that forever linked them to their beloved animated counterparts, gamers everywhere think this could finally be the Dark Knight's triumphant return to the virtual world. And the early preview buzz echoes that sentiment.

Yet for all of the game's positive reports, I can't help but shudder at the track record that other comic book characters have had through the years. Just mention Superman 64 or Aquaman: Battle for Atlantis to any gamer and watch their face cringe as if they had just tasted rancid ass.

However, hope springs eternal for both gamers and Batman fans alike, especially in light of some of his previous outings. Here are four of my personal favorites, plus the one title that nearly crippled Batman for good in the virtual world.

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In the grand tradition of Bitmob Giveaways (towels, art books, etc.), we now have in our possession two (2) Shadow Complex t-shirts for the giving away of.

Mouseover the image to see the back of the shirt, as if by magic.
Sorry, I need a new camera, I'm working on it. Also, a cat.

These shirts were hand delivered to us by Donald Mustard, creative director of Chair Entertainment and Shadow Complex. They probably spent time in his luggage between bouts of loving folding and loving unfolding. More than that I wouldn't want to guess, although according to the label they were made in Haiti, and are both 100% cotton and also Ultra Cotton(R). One is a Large, the other, an X-Large.

The somewhat-inscrutable logo on the front appears to depict two stormtrooper-esque figures, no less than four gun barrels, approximately four U.S. flags, and the upside-down silhouette of an industrial scene (the titular shadow complex itself?).

Comment below and include your preference for Large or X-Large in your comment, and we'll choose two (2) winners at random before Wednesday, August 5. Continental U.S. only, void where prohibited, and you must be registered on Bitmob with a real name and email address.

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This DJ Hero special edition is ridiculous. But not ridiculous enough for our tastes. Sure, you get a lot of crap, but, uh, where's the hero? Seriously. Fail.

News Blips:

• DJ Hero super expensive edition perfect for apartment clutter. Activision Blizzard is showing off the fancy dancy limited DJ Hero Renegade Edition that comes with a Jay-Z and Eminem CD, a carrying case, and turntable sans the cheap plastic. Considering the normal set costs $120, we're sure this premium package will cost anywhere from $121 to entirely-too-fucking-much. [Kotaku]

• UFC plans to put punishing grip on Wii/handhelds for an awkwardly long time. Thanks to the huge success of UFC 2009 Undisputed, the mixed martial arts title will soon be coming to both the Wii and handhelds. Game.Com? Please? [GameSpot]

• Mass Effect 2 strips away powers at beginning, clothes thankfully stay. Mass Effect 2 may start off immediately after the first game, but all the skills and abilities you acquired will be stripped away at the beginning. It has something to do with the story, too. Maybe Commander Shepard accidentally hit the "Reset Powers" button on the ship. Don't blame him -- we love pushing buttons, too. [Computerworld]

• Warren Spector's Epic Mickey game apparently big in size, on Wii. It's been rumored for a while that Deus Ex creator Warren Spector was working on a Mickey Mouse game, but now it seems to be true as a bunch of leaked concept art has surfaced. Apparently it's for the Wii, too. And you were going to say the Game.Com. Silly, you -- that's our overused joke! [1UP]

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I've been gaming for nearly three decades, but I do have some glaring omissions in my game résumé. One of these is the original Zork, which came out in 1980 (it's so old that some versions even ran on 8-inch floppy disks!).

Zork is one of the pillars of PC gaming: an interactive-fiction game where the nameless adventurer explores an underground labyrinth. It's spawned a series of games, including a browser-based offering from Activision that came out in April.

I'm finally going to experience Zork. And I hope that you'll experience it with me.

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Promotional videos for games make sense. Something to get you jazzed for the release. That's why we're so stoked for Def Jam Rapstar after watching this Jay-Z and Eminem rap video blow. Err, DJ Hero.

Video Blips:

• Jay-Z and Eminem rap randomly for 30 seconds. And this is apparently promoting some DJ Hero game. [GameVideos]

Continue after the break for a Ninja Gaiden 2 comparison, Shirley Manson belts out tunes in Guitar Hero 5, and Zero Punctuation reviews Wii Sports Resort.

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Editor's note: Tyler brings up a great point that most games don't have an adequate failure state. The question is, would players be comfortable if games delivered more realistic, punishing consequences? -Greg

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Games differ widely in their content. From sport games to RPGs, they provide completely different experiences. But they all share a common thread: Failure is not an option.

Players can die, lose a race, and pass out in games, but do these states constitute true failure? In these situations, the game does not end. If a player dies, he reloads from his last save and tries again; when he loses a race, he goes back to the start and tries again; and when he fails a mission, he starts over again. See a pattern?

When a player fails to do something a designer has set out for him, he will just have to do it again and again until he succeeds.

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Editor's note: David's consoles sure are lucky. Not only do they have lots of other consoles to hang out with, but he even lets them go outside on his deck for some fresh air from time to time. That's a lot of gaming history you've got there, David! - Aaron

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I received my first console, the Nintendo Entertainment System, when I was two years old. Through the years, my precious NES gained quite a bit of company. Back in December of 2006, I took the photograph up above of all my consoles and portables. I've added a few more to my library since then, making the photo somewhat outdated. Even though today's weather in Seattle is scorching hot, I decided that now was the time for me to hold another family reunion for my video game systems.

Photos of the gathering are after the break!

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Do you remember the great battle for supremacy between Nintendo and Sega? I know I do. This wasn't some war where executives and PR folks lobbed vague barbs at the competition in obscure interviews; this was war.

The most memorable attack of the clash came via the now classic "Genesis does what Nintendon't" campaign. Sega was pushing the 16-bit Genesis as the future of gaming, while Nintendo was still pumping out games for the huge user base of the NES. Rather than simply making a commercial showing how great their games were, Sega went one further and basically called Nintendo out for being stuck in gaming's past.

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Video game-themed condiment holders are a great idea. Someone should really make a chainsaw gun ketchup spewer.

Cultural Blips:

• Tetris salt and pepper set are the perfect combination. If you're bored of similarly shaped spice holders, piece together this Tetris-themed salt shaker and pepper grinder. Goes perfect with your horizontal burger. [technabob]

• Monster Hunter jacket fashionably impractical. We'd hate to battle hardened beasts wearing only this flimsy chest protector. [TinyCartridge]

• Game Genie really fat bald dude. Or so says this moderately amusing College Humor video that weirdly has no embed link. Click the link to watch. [CollegeHumor]

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