Tiny enemies: Bad things come in small packages

Mindjack
Thursday, July 07, 2011

Size matters

You’ve heard the saying “bigger is better,” but that is not always the case when it comes to video-game villains. The following baddies are short on stature but represent a big hurdle for the heroes who must fight them.

Goombas (Super Mario Bros.)
This is the very first enemy Mario encounters in Super Mario Bros., and countless gamers experienced death at the hands (legs?) of that one Goomba that trots into the screen at the beginning of stage 1-1. While not very smart, these walking mushrooms are so prolific that one will eventually get you.

Headcrabs (Half-Life)
These alien parasites can control humans by latching onto their heads and turning them into mindless zombies. Their small size and agility make them a big threat for Earth’s resistance and a formidable addition to the invading Xen army. If Gordon Freeman could talk, his first words would probably be “get these f***ing headcrabs off me!”

 

Metroids (Metroid)
In space, no one can hear you scream -- especially if you have a Metroid sucking your life force through your head. Their energy-absorbing ability has made them the prime target of Space Pirates, so bounty hunter Samus Aran has been pulverizing these small jellyfish-like creatures throughout the galaxy. Invulnerability to almost all forms of weaponry and the ability to reproduce asexually make Metroids one of the most dangerous life forms in the universe.

Crows (Resident Evil)
I don’t trust crows since I watched Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds, and the undead ones from Resident Evil have only made my animosity for them grow stronger. The T-virus has infected everything in Raccoon City, and the crows are no exception. They’re small but always attack in packs. Crows probably won’t kill you, but their diminutive size and erratic movements make them hard and frustrating targets.

Flood “infection form” (Halo)
I hate the Flood. They are gross-looking, tough to defeat, and they multiply rapidly. The “infection form” is the worst because of their quickness and minuscule size. They pop like balloons with a single shot, but a small pack of them can kill you in seconds. If the Flood get to a corpse, whether human or Covenant, they can reanimate and control it, so make killing these little bastards your top priority.

Medusa heads (Castlevania)
When not making an appearance as a boss, Medusa can be seen as a floating head which annoy the hell out of the Belmonts and fill gamers’ hearts with murderous fury. Snakes don’t fly, and neither do severed heads, so why do… You know what? Forget it. Medusa heads are the number one cause of vampire hunter deaths as well as the root of Indiana Jones’ ophidiophobia (fear of snakes). They share a tie for first place with Ninja Gaiden's hawks for game enemies I hate the most.

Rabites (Secret of Mana)
Cute, furry woodland creatures deserve death by sword too, especially if they’re gnawing at your ass. The Seiken Densetsu (Mana) series features a flood of these adorable, fluffy, rabbit-like things, and I just want to hack them all. Rabites do little to help you level up and drop crappy items, but it’s so satisfying ripping them apart! They couldn’t be farther away from being an endangered species, so let me have my fun.

Slimes (Dragon Quest)
It’s impossible to dislike slimes; just look at them: water-drop shape, mesmerizing eyes, and that perpetual smile. They’re also weaker than the Washington State football team’s defense, so they pose no threat whatsoever...or do they? New, more powerful versions of slimes have shown up in recent Dragon Quest games. The King Slime, for example, can even cast magic spells and will give you more than one experience point and gold coin when defeated.

 
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Comments (15)
Ragnaavatar2
July 07, 2011

I'd add the mosquitoes in Demon's Souls. Fighting one of those things is annoying, but when two or three gang up on you, it's frustrating as hell.

Mindjack
July 07, 2011

Even mosquitoes kill you in Demon’s Souls? I really got to play that game.

Robsavillo
July 07, 2011

Don't forget about the plague babies!

Ragnaavatar2
July 07, 2011

Oh boy, I remember the first (and not the only, sadly) time I fell into that pit filled with those babies. They obliterated me in mere seconds. Hate them. D:

Mindjack
July 07, 2011

Babies, you say?

Robsavillo
July 07, 2011

Which game is that from?

Mindjack
July 07, 2011

That's an unbaptized baby from Dante's Inferno.

Bhhdicon_copy
July 07, 2011

How about the "tiny nuclear guy" from Black's Fortress in Gunstar Heroes? That dude was a quarter the size of your character but could hand your ass to you in no time. And he blew up forever when you beat him.

Mindjack
July 07, 2011

Click to enlarge

You mean the Minion Soldier? That little shit. I forgot about him!

Robsavillo
July 07, 2011

No mention of the birds from Ninja Gaiden? Also, Metroids are...kind of large (I notice you conveniently use a screen of the baby metroid (whom you don't fight!):

Mindjack
July 07, 2011

Oh I did mention the Ninja Gaiden birds. I couldn’t hate those more!

Compared to other monstrosities Samus has to fight, Metroids are not that big. That baby actually got pretty large by the end of Super Metroid. Looks so cute and helpless in that canister, doesn’t it?

Robsavillo
July 07, 2011

Ah, you did...that's what I get for skimming.

And you never fight baby Metroids...the baby helps you defeat Mother Brain, if you remember. But you will fight these guys:

Mindjack
July 07, 2011

Wow, OK, that’s freaking huge. I was just looking for an excuse to talk about Metroids, but in the Prime series there were plenty of smaller ones. Maybe they were babies now that I think about it.

Default_picture
July 07, 2011

The Flood in the Halo games is what makes it at pain for me to play a Halo game all the way to the end. As soon as I encounter the Flood i get bored and switch over multiplayer orto another game.

Jon_ore
July 07, 2011

Anyone who's played the Castlevania games on the GBA or DS will know Medusa Heads have got nothing on simple Bats. Those ****ers are like heat seeking missiles and on Hard Mode they'll kill you in three hits.

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