Editor's note: Omar's got some tough love for all of you struggling podcasters out there in Internet land. Follow his (good) advice and you'll immediately improve your broadcast. - Aaron

After moving from Canada to France I expected to be the victim of harsh culture shock. But after a few weeks in Saint-Germain-en-Laye, I didn't feel foreign in any sense. Nothing really bothered me. Not the lingering clouds of cigarette smoke, the street-side performers or even the strange language which everyone spoke.

This all changed on the first day of school. I stood by the curb expecting a big yellow bus to whisk me off to class, until my mother explained that kids walked to school in France. I was 14 years old and my parents expected me to walk for 30 minutes through the intimidating streets of Paris, not once, but twice each day. How would my wandering and imaginative mind occupy itself on the long, daily journey?

That's when I found out about The Hotspot. Every week, I would sit impatiently at the computer, waiting for the hour-long mp3 enema which Gamespot proudly served into the malleable, innocent minds of children around the world. From start to finish, there was never a dull moment. Rich Gallup, Jeff Gerstmann, and Bob Calyaco were so dynamic and entertaining it was strange to think that they worked at a videogame website instead of at a comedy club. They bounced witty retorts off of one another, analyzing and teasing the day's story at the same time. The trio possessed a chemistry which my friends and I were envious of.

I stopped listening to the Hotspot after Rich and Jeff left Gamespot, yet I still remember the silly recurring jokes which perforated each episode. The Hotspot certainly wasn't a pioneer of the medium, but it broke ground by demonstrating how occupying the sounds of three voices could be.

However, I've recently become very tired of videogame podcasts. Almost all of the series subscribe to the "Four Dudes Talking" format. They all seem to be discussing the exact same news and games, and in the exact same fashion, too. The same jokes are made, the same lines are uttered -- it's difficult to convince myself that any of the broadcasts are unique in any real way. I listen to them when I've got little else to do, or when I'm going to bed.

In light of the increased amount of unoriginality that's plaguing today's podcasts, I'd like to take a little time to spell out the numerous pitfalls that so many podcasters fall victim to. With any luck, the podcasts recorded after the publication of this article will be slightly less boring than those recorded yesterday and today.

1. Put some production into it!

Many podcasters don't bother editing out the awkward silences, drawn-out pauses and wheezing coughs. While some glorify the idea of a "raw" recording (i.e. The Geekbox), many audience members appreciate a cleanly edited show.

You don't need a hundred sliders, but a little effort goes a long way

Trust me, doing simple things like adjusting volume levels, clearing audio debris, and adding wicked-cool fading effects will take you far. Do your best and the audience will surely notice. Try and add some music. Gamers with Jobs and Rebel FM both insert music between their segments. It gives the illusion that the entire program is more stratified and rehearsed than it actually is.

Take Robert Ashley's A Life Well Wasted as an example. Ashley spends tremendous amounts of time refining and polishing the episodes. His hard work has earned the podcast an overwhelmingly positive response and has launched the show into the Top 10 list on iTunes. Try and understand how large that dividing margin is between poorly-produced podcasts and well-produced ones.

2. Remember, you're on a podcast

As podcasters, you have to understand that you're not simply having a conversation. You're having a conversation that thousands of people will likely hear. The hosts and guests must adjust their diction, tone, register, and attitude in light of this fact. Most podcasts struggle with the same evident issues.

What's really annoying is when a host or guest makes note of something which has happened in the recording area. Laughing about someone's facial expression, a gesture, or anything else which the audience can't see only serves to alienate us. We want to be part of the fun!

Organization is another factor which seems to be missing from the equation. Too many podcasters hit the "record" button and expect the final product to be perfect. It won't be. This isn't a discussion you're having with your pals at the arcade, this is a podcast. Try and prepare the discussion. Maybe even rehearse some lines before the actual taping.

3. Add Some Personality

Listening to four guys paraphrasing Kotaku articles gets boring fast. Be different! Be exciting! Don't be afraid to resort to trite or inappropriate humor. Anything you do differently will make you stand out even more from the crowd. Ryan Scott's trademark expressions, Shawn Elliot's off-topic digressions or Shawn Andrich's outrageously loud voice -- these are all traits which the audience remembers you by. Most of them are strikingly bizarre, but the audience will ultimately enjoy the strange, uniqueness that they bring to the show.

I remember the first time I heard Seanbaby. The guy was an utter riot. Sure, some of his jokes were stupid and insensitive, but he knew how to make people laugh. Surely, the solution isn't as easy as "add some personality" or "be more like Seanbaby." So, it's important to ask yourself: Am I boring?

If the answer is "yes", podcasting might not be your calling.

4. Have Chemistry

Too many podcasts still suffer from long awkward pauses and aimless conversations. It's no fun hearing people struggle with the simple task of speaking with one another. My friends and I have subconsciously developed a flow and progression to each discussion we have. We rarely find ourselves fighting for the right to speak, instead the conversation naturally moves forward without any vocal enforcement.

Jeff Gerstmann, who can now be heard on Giant Bomb's weekly Bombcast agrees that chemistry is an essential part of any good podcast:

"I think chemistry with the people you're working with is key for a podcast. If you don't have that level of chemistry with the people you work with, it'll show in the final product. Also, being in the same room is a big deal. Being able to shoot a knowing glance to someone when you want to interrupt them or just picking up on their body language as a conversation goes on is what allows a conversation to flow naturally."

It doesn't take much effort to spot true chemistry. Each episode of GFW Radio and 1UP Yours carried on without hesititation. The guests and hosts spoke in turn, bouncing ideas and jokes off of one another. Their humor and intellect seemed to collectively mesh.

Sometimes it's just one person who screws up a group's chemistry. If you can spot them, give them the boot! The audience is likely as callous and unemotional as you are -- we'll understand!

5. Be Original!

When it comes to podcasting, the most important thing to understand is that the listener has dozens of alternatives. If your particular broadcast isn't interesting the audience will find one that is. Do something! Anything! Just be original:

Pretend you've been stranded in space and your podcast is a distress signal; your only hope at salvation from the impending doom which solitude in space presents!

Speak in the third person! Refer to yourself as "The Almighty" or "Alamo Jones."

Fart into the microphone, Shawn Elliott-style.

If you get your lunch money stolen at school, you're probably unoriginal

Bitmob ditched the traditional format of "Four dudes talking" and instead went with "Four dudes talking in a vaguely organized fashion." That small difference was enough to separate them from the competition vying for your precious time and attention.

If you regularly record a podcast, and you choose to follow these "Five Steps to Success," I can personally guarantee a 200 percent increase in subscribers, or your money back! Let's change things for the better, together!