Top 10 Hardest Games of All Time

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Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Editor's note: Matthew has clearly faced some tough times in his life. Commiserate with his 10 Hardest Games of All Time list, and add your own in the comments...my own private tormentor was Zanac. -Demian



We all have those moments. Those times when we wanted to throw our controllers, scream at the top of our lungs, or kick our furniture. The times when these games reach out from the TV and kick you in the balls. We know we should stop playing, it's what we tell ourselves -- but that game won't win this round.

So, inspired by the recent Mobcast where one of the topics was games that made you rage quit, I bring you the 10 hardest games of all times. If these games don't make you rage quit, then you're a game-playing robot from the future, my friend. And if so, I submit to your rule.

shinobi

10. Shinobi (PS2)
Shinobi holds the distinction of being difficult for one simple, yet infuriating, reason: Your sword saps your health when you're not killing bad guys. This gameplay mechanic isn't so bad, as enemies are in abundance. It's only when you get to the later levels where everything gets hellish. Enemies become harder and the levels themselves turn into exercises in platforming seppuku.


Yea, those dogs have swords in their mouths.

 

9. Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening (PS2)
Capcom decided to go back to Dante's roots for the third game in the series, showing how the demon hunter became such a bad ass. Yet in doing so, they ratcheted up the difficulty. The Japanese Hard mode became the American Normal mode, and I just died a little inside. While the game is fun, the later parts are so excruciating that Capcom had to release a special edition that balanced the difficulty.


Dante wanted to play a rock ballad and call peace. It didn't work out.

8. Mega Man 9 (XBLA, PSN, WiiWare)
The blue bomber's return was an 8-bit homage to all of our childhoods, broken dreams and all. So it's no surprise that Mega Man 9 is brutal. Chalk it up to the devious level design and superhard minibosses. The game also sports challenges that you can embark on if you're a true masochist. Example: Beat the game five times in one day. That deserves a LOLWUT?!

7.Metal Slug 3 (Xbox, XBLA)

Enough said.

6.Contra: Hard Corps (Genesis)
Considered by many to be the hardest game in the series, Contra: Hard Corps shifted focus from the usual Contra formula and featured more bosses than usual. So when you're not dealing with enemies from every side, you have to deal with six gigantic bosses in one stage, and we all know how Contra bosses rate. Somewhere on the scale between castration and Satan coming from your TV screen and punching you in the face.

5. Ikaruga (DC, GCN, XBLA)
Ikaruga is one of the greatest vertical shooters ever made. It's also one of the most unforgiving bullet hell shooters ever made. If you don't know what bullet hell is, it's when the enemies shoot so many bullets at you that the screen is literally filled with projectiles. The result is you in a fetal position on the floor.

Here's a video of a guy playing the game in 2 player co-op...by himself.

This guy is some kind of sorcerer.

4. Kid Icarus (NES)
Kid Icarus has the honor of being the franchise that Nintendo forgot it owned. After the NES game, the only other title to be released was the GB game, Of Myths of Monsters. Kid Icarus combines the weapon upgrade system of Metroid, adventure gameplay of Zelda, and platforming of Mario, while keeping its hernia-inducing difficulty. See, in the beginning of the game, you have to climb vertically to get to your first destination. If you fall, you die. Hey, land on that cloud just an inch from your target? You slip and die. Need that extra heart container? Costs too much, go back and farm enemies that have the flight patterns of crazed meerkats. If you can beat this game, send me an email and I will personally kiss your ass.

3. Ninja Gaiden (NES, SNES)
Ninja Gaiden has always been a difficult game, so its position is no surprise. Even in its modern incarnations it retains its memories, like your old grandfather who wont die and leave you the inheritance. Yet, what stands out in the original NES release is the fact that enemies will wait silently off-screen, only to strike the moment you jump over a gap:

And the cutscenes are their own special kind of pain.

2. Battletoads (NES)
Battletoads was made by Rare and is probably the reason they now make cutesy collect-a-thons. This game was the hardest beat-em-up on the NES, thanks to levels that required split-second jumps and overwhelmed you with more enemies than I thought the NES could render. If anyone tells you they beat this game, they are a liar, because no one got past the hoverbike sequence.


The last thing you saw before taking this game back to the rental store.

1.Takeshi's Challenge (Famicon)
Here it is people. The number one hardest game of all time, Takeshi's Challenge. Created by comedian Takeshi Kitano, a notorious videogame hater, the game was designed to mess with your mind and screw with you on purpose. Bizarre actions were required to progress through the game: punching 20,000 times, singing into the Famicon microphone to get a great rating on karaoke, not touching the controls for an hour, and a side-scrolling stage where you had to dodge obstacles, but the up button on the d-pad didn't work. The game is literal insanity in a cart, and any attempts to understand it will leave you like Bruce Willis in 12 Monkeys, in a permanent time loop.


This is as normal as it gets.

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There you have it, Bitmobbers, the 10 hardest games of all time. Don't agree? Let me know in the comments what games I left off and what your lists are.

Follow me on twitter:mattamusprime

Facebook: Matthew Erazo

Or email me:matthew.erazo@gmail.com

 
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Comments (35)
Picture_15
July 01, 2009
I like your list. Scott Patterson of Twin Galaxies is writing a 10 Hardest Games of All Time list as well. The input of his list is from World Record Gamers and a few of the games on your list were mentioned repeatedly. Very cool.
Demian_-_bitmobbio
July 01, 2009
I don't see Zanac on this list. According to my calculations, I'm the only person ever to beat it. Also, know how to fix the aspect ratio of those videos?
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July 01, 2009
I think I got it. Resized to 560x340
Jason_wilson
July 01, 2009
Great list! I still haven't beaten Mega Man 9 yet -- Ikaruga was much easier compared to it!
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July 01, 2009
@Demian I did forget Zanac, only because I could never beat it :P
Demian_-_bitmobbio
July 01, 2009
That's what I like to hear!
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July 01, 2009
Ikaruga. You ruined my fingers.
Jason_wilson
July 01, 2009
I do remember Kid Icarus being difficult. I pulled my brother out of the pool so he could see me beat it.
Picture_15
July 01, 2009
I'm actually playing Zanac for NES right now as a monthly challenge issued to everyone by Scott PSP Patterson a referee and Director of Marketing for Twin Galaxies.[url]http://forums.twingalaxies.com/viewtopic.php?f=49&t;=16140[/url]
Picture_15
July 01, 2009
Zanac is pretty tough so far. I think Contra Hard Corps was about as hard as Contra Force for NES.
Mini
July 02, 2009
I was only able to finish Megaman 9 once. Also, I've heard you can save right at Wily's castle and continue loading that save until you get the achievement for finishing 5 times in a day.
Pshades-s
July 02, 2009
The tough parts of Kid Icarus weren't the regular scrolling stages, they were the labyrinths you had to navigate without any map, full of Eggplant Wizards who could all but end your game with a single hit. Thankfully the bosses weren't too tough, but by the time you reached them you were already exhausted and low on life.
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July 02, 2009
Really awesome list, but just a quick correction: the Bruce Willis movie was 12 Monkeys, not seven.
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July 02, 2009
Shinobi was the first PS2 game I owned, and it took two of us swapping the controller back and forth to get through almost every level of the game. The beginning wasn't so bad but somewhere around the middle is where it started to totally kick our asses. And it being the only game I owned at the time I would rage quit only to pick my controller back up forty-five minutes later and try again. Sadly never actually beat the game. Oh and screw those damn dogs. Devil May Cry 3 was the only other game on this list I've actually played. I had two or three levels left when my PS2 memory card got corrupted and deleted my save. Haven't gone back to it yet.
Default_picture
July 02, 2009
The hardest game I played all the way through till the end was Syphon Filter 3. The only reason I did though was for the story (especially since that game ended the original trilogy and it wrapped up the story). I personally [b][/b] hate[b][/b] hard games. I play games to have fun, to experience unique gameplay, and/or for a great story and characters. But if a game is too frustrating I will quit, since I play games to enjoy them, not to get angry and feel frustrated. I personally don't get why some gamers love hard games. Yeah, I know you feel a sense of accomplishment. But for me that isn't worth playing the same parts of a game over and over again. Besides, in the time it takes to beat a hard game, one could have read a good book or beaten two normal difficulty games.
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July 02, 2009
@Michael Mccarthy Whoops, i was thinking of se7en and 12 monkeys and my brain spit out seven monkeys
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July 02, 2009
I used to play Battletoads all the time... started when I was 4. So I guess my relentlessness helped? I beat it. It's just memorization. I played it recently and had no trouble. Just get the warps on the racing parts, it's not so bad. The snake levels were my favorite.
Greg_ford
July 02, 2009
@Jason Wilson: I'm just the opposite. Felt Mega Man 9 was much easier than Ikaruga, so was only able to beat the former.
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July 02, 2009
When I saw the title of the post I was afraid megaman 9 wasnt gona make the list. That game defiantly deserves the spot. It has caused me so much pain. At a sleep over with about ten people there, I completly hoged a tv and made it to the last stage without losing a life only to end up dieing, throwing my controller at the ground so hard that it bounced across the room it somebody in the head after richoshaying off the ceiling. I then jumped up and kicked blindly at the air, only to hit my ps3. The system was fine, but i spent the next 10 minuets convinced that I had broken my toe.:'( and yet I keep going back to that game
Ragnaavatar2
July 02, 2009
Pretty nice list. I agree with Battletoads on such a high spot, although I did manage to get past the hoverbikes once or twice. Not that I got much farther though. PS: WTF is wrong with the dude playing Ikaruga?
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July 02, 2009
EA Sports Active is the hardest game I've played. It's funny, too, because my introduction (that I'm currently writing) for Active will mention some of these games. We must be twins. :D
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July 02, 2009
Great article, Matthew. I have yet to brave most of the games on your list. I suppose that makes me a faint-of-heart gamer. Anyway, I noticed a couple errors in your post. -The sentence "We know we should stop playing, it's what we tell ourselves -- but that game won't win this round." should have a second dash instead of a comma after "playing." The first two clauses are both complete, so a comma isn't strong enough to tie them together. If you enclose the second independent clause within dashes, you can keep the independent clause -- independent clause -- dependent clause structure of your sentence. -You wrote "Of Myths of Monsters" instead of "Of Myths and Monsters." That's it. Thanks for the fun read!
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July 02, 2009
Although I would agree with the list in general, I'm a little surprised to not see a Touhou game instead of Ikaruga. Some of those games make playing Ikaruga look like Space Invaders.
Demian_-_bitmobbio
July 02, 2009
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July 02, 2009
Mega Man 9 was my first original Mega Man experience, and I didn't have much trouble with it. Now R-Type Dimensions on the other hand--that was brutal. I got very close to the end of R-Type 1 and 2, then realized I wouldn't get any farther unless I spent weeks with it.
Default_picture
July 02, 2009
Metal Slug 3 [i]almost[/i] made me throw my PSP.
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July 02, 2009
Ghosts n' Goblins made yell at the cartridge as if it was an indignant child that wouldn't listen to me.
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July 02, 2009
love the captions Matt!
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July 03, 2009
I agree with some of the game choices. Battletoads I agree is hard, but I wouldn't place it so high. I can consistently get up to the 5th level or so, where you have to ride a series of snakes over a pit. Good times. Some games that I think have been overlooked, though. Kid Chameleon. This game ranged from easy to insanely hard. It is compounded by the seemingly endless nature of the game. The levels just keep coming. Cruise For A Corpse. Point and click adventures can vary, but this game was neigh impossible. Personally, it took me almost 5 years to complete. Those French are tricky. Silkworm. I can honestly see no way a sane person could have finished this game. Also, how on earth does a jeep jump without a ramp?
Jason_wilson
July 03, 2009
@Greg Ford: Really? Mega Man 9 kicks my ass regular. But I'm not that good at platforming. Shooters, on the other hand, are some of my favorite games.
Default_picture
July 03, 2009
"Shin Megami Tensei : Nocturne" ps2
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July 05, 2009
i have 25 yrs. of gaming experience. one thing i learned is that life is too short to play games in normal or hard setting. are you nuts? easy mode it is for me, as long as there are no extra stages missing in easy.
Default_picture
July 07, 2009
I am still one of the proud owners of the "Level 9 Challenge" Lost Levels badges...
Waahhninja
January 10, 2010
Takeshi Kitano was a comic?! I've seen at least 5 of his movies and he never struck me as a funny guy. Deathly serious and terribly quiet. Interesting.
Pshades-s
January 10, 2010
Tom, Takeshi still is a "comedian" of sorts, regularly appearing on Japanese TV and making fun of himself. But yes, his movies are typically more serious than one would expect given his television persona.

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