Hard to handle: My dilemma with "online identities"

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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

I have a personal problem with titles.  I believe it originated from my military days when it was required of me to address my "superiors" by either their rank or, if they were an officer, "Sir" or "Ma'am".  Don't get me wrong...I'm all for respecting others and giving the deserved their due.  However, I've encountered enough "title abusers" for me to see the act of using designations in the place of their birth name as anything but ideal.

This leads me to my arguably irrational problem of using "online identities", the internet's handle of choice with the unfortunate designation of being title's "cousin", or at least, a"known associate".

Having an online identity can be helpful.  On one hand, they can offer a sense of security for people that want to contribute to an online community but would rather their personal info not be online.  Case in point, a game developer wanting to speak his or her mind without the risk of their employer handing over walking papers.  Also, having a carefully selected one can make creating accounts on websites infinitely easier then running the risk of picking "Chris_Whittington_2348" as your login ID for each one.

As for me, my standard online identity, RocGaude, falls into the later category.  It's just a means to an end.  There's nothing wrong with people calling me "Roc", per se.  It's a swell term of endearment  that I earned from my wife who is constantly catching me doing my best Angus Young in the mirror.

The only problem is that whenever someone calls me "Roc", I shudder a bit.  It's almost as if my hailing by a name other then my own is a cop-out for me somehow.  A cover up, a comb-over covering what needs to be shorn, an act of contempt that makes me no better then, then...YouTube commentators. 

Maybe I'm taking this too seriously.  Using a nickname should be fun, a means to further the escapism of video game immersion.  I mean, sure, it's cool for some people to shout out "I'm taking damage!  Flank 'em, xXViperShaftXx!!" but when I'm chewing dirt in the digital trenches, I'd rather stick with a more reasonable "Just shoot the green assholes, Rick!". 

See, I'm the kind of guy that enjoys donning a singular face for the world to see.  Whether you talk with me in person or online, you're getting the same Chris.  Chris.  It's a good name...not very unique, but pleasing to my ear all the same.  It's not like my parents declared me a smite on humanity and named me Chester or something. 

In the SquadCast, we used our online identities as a way of differentiating ourselves from the rest of the world and each other, especially since there are four Chris's in the group.  They were also relics from our 1UP Radio Board days.  We even entertained the notion that we were sorta like M.A.S.K. or G.I. Joe, covert operatives ready to discover and tackle the world's greatest lost treasures.  My inner 10 year-old pumped his fist in victory.

On our last episode, we decided to drop them from our intro as a way to give ourselves more credibility, to stand and be accounted for.  I was totally on board and even offered up a "swear jar" if you called someone by their handle.  We were finally ourselves and we didn't need no stinking badges.

However, once the chest beating had died down, my inner 10 year-old's heart sunk a little that day.  Gone was the idea that I was on a secret mission to uncover the mysteries of the ancients and that it was time to tuck that notion away in response to reality's call. 

I guess there was something to like about being called "Roc" after all.

Thanks for reading - Chris

For further discussion:  Bitmob's decision to have it's community members use their real names vice false ones is one of my favorite aspects of the site and reflects a maturity that's sorely needed in the game's space.  Still, there's a bit of goofy fun that gets left behind.

As for you, when do you use online identities?  How would you like to see them used?

 
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Comments (35)
Mikeminotti-biopic
January 26, 2010
I have mixed feelings. I was actually pretty proud to have made friends that were comfortable calling me by some name I made up for myself, but it's hard to reconcile that with the legitimacy that comes with a real name. I'll try to respond with better thoughts in the morning :)
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January 26, 2010
I actually use my gaming side during my daily duties at work. It for me is just one way I can show of my gamer side.
Nick_with_grill
January 26, 2010
I don't mind aliases or nicknames in the 'game place,' as long as they're not ridiculous. FiremanDan = okay B8terbabycooker = not okay
N712711743_851007_3478
January 26, 2010
I've had issues with online handles ever since I've had to use one. Like you, my name is shared by what feels like at least 75% of the world's male population (hell, there's a second Matt Mason on this site, for Pete's sake!); which meant I had to come up with something craftier to give myself individuality. I really like that Bitmob gets rid of those pretenses and forces users to "use" their real name. Sure, I've had to add my middle one as well; but like you said, it's great to hear people call you by the name your parents gave you. I plan on trying my hand at podcasting in the next couple of months, and it's a relief to know that I can be myself in title and voice without having to consider what people expect a "BiscuitSpace" to sound like. It's OK; I just cringed at that too.
January 26, 2010
Great post "Roc"....I mean Chris ;) (Sorry..some habits die hard) I have always had issues with online handles that seemed totally random. However, if people at least stayed consistent with their choice of handle, I couldn't really fault them for anything because it still allowed you to attach a person to the identity. That was something I truly appreciated about the Squadron of Shame - You always knew who was who and you could find ways to connect to these people through other means (various boards, twitter, etc..) because their online identities stayed consistent. However, I do understand the issue regarding lack of legitimacy using handles that don't connect to our actual names. It is for that reason that I have always used 'mjpilon' (which is essentially a shortening of my full name) when a handle was required. It is close enough to my name that it feels more "legitimate" to me and if people use my handle to identify me, it isn't as weird to me as some unrelated handle. However, I much prefer the use of actual names and support any initiative that attempts to stick to actual names.
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January 26, 2010
@Mike It's the morning and your "better" response is nowhere to be found. Chop chop. @Toby Well, you have a much cooler workplace then I've ever been a part of. Right on. @Nick Unless your a Chippendale dancer, FiremanDan is pretty suspect. @Matt It would probably sound like warm milk gravy poured out of a ladle. You'll be huge in the South.
Photo_on_2010-08-03_at_16
January 26, 2010
I used to loathe my "real" name. I still hate being called "Peter", hence my steadfast refusal to fill out my name as "Peter" on any form except the most official of official ones. I also, at school, used to find my surname clumsy and awkward, and always feel strange saying my own name out loud. "Angry Jedi" kind of came about by accident. While I was training to be a teacher, a buddy and I used to make some comedy breakbeat dance tracks under the pseudonym "Angry Jedi". When I joined a teaching forum, I used the name as a unique ID which stuck with me - the forum in question was relatively low-population and thus had a very close-knit community where you got to know people very quickly. So it stuck, as it did on 1up too, where I also used it as my handle. I don't have a particular issue with it one way or the other. I actually like being the hybrid Pete "Angry Jedi" Davison. I never had a cool nickname at school or university, so I enjoy having a pseudonym that is distinctive and unique - the only place I've ever run into another Angry Jedi was on Xbox Live, where the bastard got the gamertag before I did. I guess I'm saying I like nicknames, as long as they're not stupid. If they have numbers in them instead of letters, or a variant of "xXx" at either end, then I am chemically wired to think less of that person. It's an automatic response. I can't help it. They might be lovely people. But I am prejudiced. :)
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January 26, 2010
@MJ You are in the enviable position of having a name that not only sounds cool when spoken in French (Pee-lo) but also fits your football persona when spoken in English (Pile-on). :) @Pete You're always the voice of reason, Pete. Someday I'll have to write something up that really pisses you off so the world can see how "angry" you really are. ;)
Photo_on_2010-08-03_at_16
January 26, 2010
Oh Chris. You know what pisses me off. I've made it very clear on my last few blogs, I believe. But that is, of course, off-topic and something I won't get into here. :)
Aj_newfoundland_avatar
January 26, 2010
My problem has always been that my name is a nickname. For the longest time, I never actually responded to Armand. It wasn't until college when people really began using it, and it was always used in a nickname context. If someone was being serious or personable with me, they always defaulted back to AJ. As for Ajguy, it was born out of finding out that most sites require a handle of at least 5 characters. I figured that my name is AJ and I'm a guy, so why not. Oddly enough, that name has stuck with some of my brothers' friends who aren't even online. Oh the confusion!
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January 26, 2010
Hey, why don't we all start using our original videogame nicknames? Pete, you get POO. Chris, you'll be ASS. AJ can be AAA, and I'll be...hmmm...Slayer 1.
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January 26, 2010
@Pete True. I should've been more specific. ;) @AJ I've known so many AJs that it's a real name to me, too. Funny how that happens. @Jeff No, you'll be DIK.
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January 26, 2010
Can I havean umlaut at least?
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January 26, 2010
@Jeff Only for European territories.
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January 26, 2010
I made a similar response a few days ago regarding online personas and how you act in reallife.Since I do try to amalgamate these two so how people perceive me stays consistent and true to myself,I try to make my online IDs fit things I like,how I act,or pseudonyms of my real name.One I've been using for years is Gin,which stems from a name I used when I was part of a webgroup for the anime .hack//SIGN.It basically means silver in japanese; I was in a slight "weeaboo" phase at the time,but I wanted something that fit me since silver is a color that represents nobility.Later added on another name,Makoto,which would roughly translate the whole thing to "Sincere Silver". Lately I've also been using my pinname A.L. on webcomic pages or using the name Undisclosed as to not always giving alot of information about myself all the time.
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January 26, 2010
I've always struggled with nicknames, online or otherwise. Oh, sure, I like 'em just fine for other people, but no one has ever managed to come up with a decent one for me. The most common one I've heard,"Craig-O," elicits a death-glare when spoken by anyone except my mother or my one friend Evan (who has special privileges). As for pseudonyms, the first one I came up with, back in my pre-teen Hotmail days, was "cjbomb." (First two initials plus "bomb." So cool, I know.) I outgrew it pretty quickly and moved to craig_117, which was a nod to my crazy Halo fandom. When Halo 2 came out, I became FirstStrike117 on Xbox Live, and carried that name onto the 1UP Radio boards too. But after a while, it struck me as a little confrontational for a general online handle. I'm not even all that happy with my current "incarnation" as scribble/scribl. The idea came from my fondness for writing and doodling, but the name itself still seems a little too juvenile for me. On Twitter, I briefly played with switching to @craigostrin, but it's too many characters for my liking. I'm rather fond of my current Xbox Live handle, PensiveMuffin. It's the first time I picked a randomly generated name and stuck with it. Although, I'm not sure if it's something I'd carry into the rest of my Internet presence, since half the reason I like it so much is the juxtaposition with names like xXxKnifeDagger007xXx and -ShadowSniper- on the rest of XBL. ;D
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January 26, 2010
One last thing: I recently signed up on the [url=http://www.quartertothree.com/game-talk/index.php]Quarter to Three[/url] forums with my real name, and I feel strangely exposed. Not that I'm a troll or anything, but there's a lot more pressure to [i]not look dumb[/i] when your real-life reputation is at stake, especially in a place where a lot of industry insiders hang out. I'm constantly terrified of saying something stupid there, especially when I have such a unique and easily-Googled name.
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January 26, 2010
@Antonio I can always respect any effort to create a persona that really says something about a person. For example, tattoos are way cooler when it's something from the owner's own life as opposed to a random tribal image or the Chinese symbol for "flaccid". Actually, that last one would be appropriate for a lot of folks... @Craig One of the biggest motivating factors of using RocGaude was because I had to come up with something quick to replace my ill-advised first XBL gamertag, MuchoCowbell. Never name yourself after a timely joke, folks.
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January 26, 2010
Chris-Leader this is Chris-4 Standing by... Great article! I've always felt like real world names for online friends seem almost intrusive when I use them, as if I'm forcing myself into a position of more familiarity than I actually have. Kind of like if you started referring to a friend by the pet-name his wife gave him...technically accurate, but a little weird :) That said, it doesn't bother me at all when someone online refers to me by my real name, since that's what I'm used to being called most of the time. Although, yeah...there's a part of me that still likes having a secret-hero identity :)
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January 26, 2010
@Craig I really like the community over at Quarter to Three. That's where a lot of industry types culminate. Using your real name is a good choice there. In fact, I need to email Tom Chick and ask that he change my name to the real deal.
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January 26, 2010
@Chris One of my work buddies found out a truly embarrassing pet name from my wife once and used it at work. Luckily, no one really heard it, at least as far as I know. Not cool...not at all. :P
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January 26, 2010
@Chris Whittington-I feel the same way too.I can't tell you how many uncreative or inane names I've seen people used,especially on a particular anime/social website where kids there think it's cool to add i[insert word as your lame name here] in front of everything.It makes me cringe as to what made them think it was even a great idea. I think flaccid as a n ID could go both ways depending on the context it's being used in ;).
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January 26, 2010
@Chris W. Hah, that's funny. I just typed up a PM to Tom Chick asking him to change my name to just Craig (or something like that), and I'm debating sending it. Oh, also, it is the weirdest thing in the world when online friends call you by your online name in a real-life setting. My WoW guildies kept slipping up and calling me "Kroan" at BlizzCon and PAX.
Redeye
January 26, 2010
I personally am on the other end of the spectrum. I don't like my real name. I don't like myself physically. I don't like myself emotionally. I don't like my station in life. All of that, for me, is something I can put aside and try to be something better and more responsible online. That mentality and the fact that I'm one of countless Jeffs in the world makes me uncomfortable with using my real name online. Still I do it at Bitmob out of respect for what they are trying to do to stem the tide of people who abuse the gift of being anonymous. When coming up with my online name I had countless problems. I would have ideas here and there but they would either seem too much like I was trying to misrepresent myself or was being childish. I'm not one to name myself after something I think I do well because I'm of the opinion that doing that is just waiting for someone else to come along and invalidate your name by beating you at it. At one point I came up with a name for one of my characters, Mi,(this was long before the Wii or it's Miis was announced) who basically took that name to confuse people. 'Who are you?' 'i'm Me' 'Well sure but what's your name?'. Then afterward I got the idea briefly that it would be funny to parody the concept of misspelling words that used the concept of self in the phrase "Me, Myself, and I" and from working on that the name "Meyeselph" Was pulled out of my butt. I took that as my net handle from then on out because it's something that acknowledges that I'm never going to be any more then I am, but I can try to fudge some of the details to make myself something more then just an unlucky nothing. In a way I choose my online name as something I was good at after all. I'm good at being Myself. Not much else, but at least i'm good at something.
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January 26, 2010
@Meyeselph I really enjoyed reading your response. I think you submitted a strong argument for the "other side". Well done, sir. :)
Mikeminotti-biopic
January 26, 2010
@Chris My morning is more like most people's late afternoon.
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January 26, 2010
Funny that you mention it, Chris. When we were recording last I agreed with Jeff on the idea of "Why are we using our handles again when nobody else is doing it?" but listening to the Squadcast without constant references to the nicknames made me a little bit sad. On one hand you have that awesome clubhouse kind of vibe that the old names represented. You know, the GI Joe, MASK thing. On the other?... Well, it's hard to claim legitimacy when you submit a resume with the name TUrdDuMPst3r or something on it. When I was a child I spake as a child and all that. In my case the idea of being called Beige goes back a lot farther than the old 1UP boards. It's a university thing, I suppose -- an artifact of a particular time and place. In the Squad I was always proud of the fact that our handles were tied implicitly to a sort of brand -- a personality, I guess, advanced on the boards through the little square sigs. I liked knowing that "Iscariot" or "Papapishu" had my back, and I'm sure that the quasi military thing was indirectly responsible for the Squadron being... you know.. a squadron. As opposed I guess to every other lump of dudes out there who enjoys listening to themselves yammer on about games. I can absolutely understand the argument that says there comes a time for putting those kind of things away though. It's just a branding thing, I guess and your mileage varies depending on your brand equity. Now that Beige is largely an artifact, I kinda miss stepping into those spiky shoes and stomping around.
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January 26, 2010
@Mike You fit right in the freelancing scene, then. ;) @Mark I'm so glad to see your words again. :) I don't think we'll ever permanently dispose of our handles. There's a touch of childish magic to using them that needs to live on. Without that, games lose something that makes them intrinsically enjoyable in the first place.
Jason_wilson
January 26, 2010
Using our real names makes us accountable for what we say. We can't hide behind some silly online handle. I think it promotes more adult, thoughtful conversation. I use my real name on every board I belong to (though the editing boards tend to encourage the use of real names as we're all editors discussing the craft). I think to the San Francisco Chronicle's website, where some of the most hateful, vitriolic commenters in the known universe post. They ruin any attempt at thoughtful conversation of the news, and much of that is because so many of them hide behind handles instead of their names. @Craig mentions his reluctance to say something stupid. Don't feel reluctant to say something you feel is important. On every board, someone will attack your idea as stupid at some point, whether you use your real name or not.
Redeye
January 26, 2010
@Craig Thankee sir. I thought it was an interesting perspective to bring to the agrument. Not everyone in the world has a sentimental attachment to their christian name after all.
Photo_on_2010-08-03_at_16
January 26, 2010
@Roc (Yeah, I went there.) How nice it is to see old-school Squad discussion again. We must do more of this sort of thing. I don't have a lot else to add to my earlier comment, save for the fact it's been a pleasure to read everyone's responses and see some thoughtful discussion.
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January 26, 2010
@Jason Exactly. That's the primary cause for my ill ease towards handles. I'm very fortunate that the group that I "run around the internet" with always raise the countenance of the discussion in every thread or discussion we participate in. Trolls tend to avoid most conversations that have posts containing proper grammar and *gasp* paragraphs. Of course, you can't avoid them entirely but the number run-ins we have with them is at "an acceptable level". ;) @Jeffrey You're quite welcome...and I think I see what you did there. Clever. :) @Pete That's the idea, brotha.
Photo_on_2010-08-03_at_16
January 27, 2010
@Chris: Yeah. Trolls have only derailed one of our discussions (quite spectacularly so) but I'm quite impressed we haven't attracted more weirdoes. I mean, more than the ones we already have in the group. BA-DING! You're right though, an environment that encourages good grammar, paragraph breaks and isn't afraid to write more than 20 words in a post is not conducive to effective trolling for the most part. If there's one thing I hate from modern internet culture, it's accusations of "OMG WALL OF TEXT". It's a fair enough comment when there's no paragraph breaks (and that sometimes isn't the fault of the writer - MyBlog right here has done funny things with paragraph breaks on occasion) but for something that's just long and well thought out? Get the hell outta here. Another reason to like BitMob. Because the whole site is built on "OMG WALL OF TEXT"s, no-one bitches about them.
Jason_wilson
January 27, 2010
@Pete "OMG WALL OF TEXT" It's an indication of a weak, dismissive mind when most people leave this on other forums -- and outright admission that "I'm too damn lazy to read what you wrote, so I'm just going to bitch about it."
Photo_on_2010-08-03_at_16
January 27, 2010
@Jason: Definitely. If you're not reading my post, you don't need to tell me. Just don't read it. (Not you, obviously.) It's another symptom of the laziness and "I want it NOW!" culture that is endemic to a lot of online communities. Many people are so used to instant gratification that they find it very difficult to actually put the effort in to read something with a bit of substance.

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