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Retro Ads: Top 15 Craziest NES Commercials

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Friday, July 30, 2010

This week on Craziest Commercials, we take a look at the most peculiar and downright horrifying ads for the Nintendo Entertainment System and its products. Beware the maximum raditude radiating from the following videos -- you might walk away from them calling everyone dude.


1) You Cannot Beat Us

The only beating I want to do is with a stick. Gah!

 

 

 

2) First NES Commercial

Consoles come from eggs?

3) Kirby's Adventure

Kirby never needs to pump iron.

4) Crystalis

This is actually selling me on finally playing Crystalis.

5) Dragon Warrior

I doubt any newcomer to the Dragon Quest/Dragon Warrior franchise
would have any clue what the game was actually like based on this ad.

 

6) Ultra Games

But I thought Konami made Ultra Games, not a floating head....

 

7) The Legend of Zelda

In the words of Ali G, "Stay off the crack."

8) Swords and Serpents

What if warriors really did have '80s perms?

 

9) Acclaim Wireless Controllers

They're right! I have a hard time doing backflips while holding a wired controller.

 

10) Metroid and Rad Racer

Oi, Samus is a lady!

 

11) Yoshi's Cookie

When I think cookies, I always think of zombie children.

12) Caveman Games

What a disgustingly sexist game.

13) Game Genie

Oh god, the rad-iation!

 

14) Dr. Mario

Imagine piercing your nose with a bone, kid. Then you'll know better than to challenge a witch doctor to a video game.

 

15) Doki Doki Panic!

That's a foreshadowing handshake....


Want more crazy commercial action? Check out the past installments: Atari 2600.

Stay tuned for the Sega Genesis edition coming next week!

 
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JASMINE MALEFICENT REA'S SPONSOR
Comments (6)
Default_picture
July 30, 2010

Wow, I cannot believe that Zelda commercial is real.

The Dr. Mario and Kirby commercials are the only two I remember seeing as a kid.

L_c2190f9bee5fe40dffa673d9a8cc0493
July 30, 2010

I'm loving those commercials, haven't seen any of them before. It's funny how a lot of them show little to no gameplay.

Default_picture
July 30, 2010

Wow I remeber most of those commercials lol.  I forgot that Rad Racer was 3D I remeber playing with the glasses.  I forgot about the legendarity of the Zelda commercial, they probably told that dude to freestyle it and thats what they went with.  Who could forget the Game Genie Bill and Ted rip off commercial they played that commerial during every commercial break.  On a side note late in the life of my NES the only way I could get games to play was if I used the game genie adapter.

Default_picture
July 30, 2010

I'm pretty sure that #13 is a clip from the casting for Bill And Ted's Excellent Adventure.

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August 02, 2010

The Game Genie commercial is a shameless ripoff of Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. (1989)

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August 02, 2010

Wow, I'm actually surprised by how well I could quote that Game Genie commercial!  They must have really played that one to death, but as a kid with an NES I remember never getting tired of it.

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