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Can you decipher these uninspired, misinterpreted, or just plain messed-up video-game titles?

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Editor's note: Tired of the towering giant that is EA's Madden franchise? Check out Andrew's humorous suggestions for some authentic, pigskin replacements. -James

By locking up the exclusive rights to the NFL, EA's Madden series has absolutely crushed the football-video-game competition. While Take Two's All-Pro Football was a valiant attempt to put a dent in Madden's marketshare, the effort fell short in a quixotic sort of way -- its reviews and sales were less than impressive.

So how do you fight the juggernaut of sports-game franchises? Developers take note: I have some impressive suggestions. And if you do take them, my legal team will be in touch; I'm sure we can come to an amicable resolution.

Notre Dame Fighting Irish Football: The Fighting Irish Video Game of Fighting Irish

No collegiate football program is as storied as Notre Dame's. While its luster has dulled in recent years, the name holds incredible cache among Catholics, people who pretend to be Irish, those who wish they had a college education, and those who aren't aware that Notre Dame actually makes its home in Indiana.

Notre Dame Fighting Irish Football will feature only one playable team: Notre Dame. And instead of their usual opponents, they will play against famous teams like the '72 Dolphins, the '85 Bears, the '27 Yankees, the '83-'84 Boston Celtics, and the '02 gold-medal-winning Olympic Hockey team, Team Canada.

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Editor's note: Michael is beginning to show a bit of a knack for dreaming up writing exercises that engage the community. This challenge was all about distilling one's writing down to its essentials. I think it was some famous guy that said, "Brevity is the soul of wit."  I wonder who that was.... -James

I'm going to level with you guys: I was a little worried. With one week to go before the entries for The Final Cut were due, I only had two submissions -- and one of them was my sample review. I started to think that this time, I had created a challenge that was too difficult or one that wasn't well-suited to the Bitmob community. In a place that grants writers the freedom to express themselves as they see fit, a writing prompt that asks authors to continuously cut their reviews down to meet increasingly more difficult word counts is a hard sell.

Thankfully, my fears were unnecessary. Several of you decided to take part in my writing prompt, and I'm grateful for your support. You came up with some great examples of distilled prose -- examples that I'm pleased to share with the Bitmob community.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls...this is The Final Cut.

The Final Cut -- Ceremony of Innocence

by Richard Moss

Richard kicks off the challenge with a bang. He chooses a very obscure game for his review. In fact, the game, Ceremony of Innocence, might not even be a game at all in the traditional sense. However, his review is definitely a review, and it gets sharper and clearer with each cut. 

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I think the various consoles should set aside their differences, team up, go through a cheesy montage sequence, and battle the dreaded foes of boredom and placidity throughout the galaxy. Curse my '90s-television upbringing.

News Blips:

An industry research company asserts that the PS3 will eventually outsell its competition during the current console generation. The company indicated that the PS3 "will still be a commercial platform five years after the Wii has been replaced. Lifetime PS3 sales are predicted to reach 127 million units, compared to 103 million Wii units." The analysis also noted that worldwide console sales will fall by 9% this year, but overall figures of consoles installed in households will continue to grow. By the time we realize the extent of the console network across the globe, Skynet will have us in its web. [IndustryGamers]

Speaking with IndustryGamers, industry veteran Will Wright (The Sims) believes that the Wii belongs in the toy market. Wright stressed the stark difference in gameplay that the Wii provides, lending a toy-like level of fun instead of the involved experiences of the Xbox 360 or PS3. "It really is more into what I would call the toy market, because most of the Wii games I've enjoyed felt more like toys than like games," he said. I think Wright is on to something here -- I've amused myself for hours on end just by driving my cat crazy with the Wiimote.

An anonymous source has confirmed that Sony will implement a familiar-looking nunchuck add-on for its Arc motion-control device. In a move that aims to bring Wii developers into the PS3 camp, and in order to facilitate a developer's "upgrade" to the PS3, the new add-on will feature elements "reminiscent" to the Wii's own controller. Tomorrow, Sony will reveal addition details in a special event at the Game Developers Conference. Oh, great -- first it looked like a Spin Pop, now it resembles a deep-sea creature. [Develop]

Microsoft has no plans to adopt Blu-ray support into the Xbox 360. In the past, the restrictive storage limit of the Xbox 360's disc media has forced developers to cut content from their games. This led to a push for transition in to the much-lauded Blu-ray format. Microsoft remains adamant that the future lies with digital distribution: Director of Xbox and Entertainment Stephen McGill proclaims that "the future of home entertainment started last autumn when Xbox 360 became the first and only console to offer instant-on 1080p streaming HD movies." I fervently hope that CEO Steve Ballmer doesn't help out by bounding across a stage while yelling his lungs hoarse. [CVG]

Got any hot news tips? Send 'em over to tips@bitmob.com.

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Bizarre Creations developers Geb Talbot and Garreth Wilson join Dan Hsu, Demian Linn, and Brett Bates on this week's show, which kicks off Bitmob's "3 Great Prizes, 3 Ways to Win" giveaway. 

The group recalls their favorite racing games, pit Bad Company 2 against Modern Warfare 2, suggest N64 games that need to be re-released, and discuss just how aware game reviewers need to be about other forms of media.

Have a question you want answered? Want to share some important insight with the world? E-mail the crew at letters@bitmob.com.

Click here to find out how you can get in on the "3 Great Prizes, 3 Ways to Win" giveaway.

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At the risk of being publicly flogged for making an outdated Xzibit reference, I'm happy to announce that all you folks who (I've heard) like Bitmob can now have "Bitmob in your Bitmob," as it were, on your browser.

Simply click on the links below to install a Bitmob theme on your preferred browser. Note that you'll need to be on Firefox 3.6+ to install Personas (fancy Firefox lingo for "themes") and on Chrome 3.0+ to install the theme.

Enjoy -- and I would love any feedback or suggestions for future Bitmob-related stuff!

• Personas for Firefox | Bitmob 1.1
  
• Bitmob.com Theme - Google Chrome Extensions
  

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This week on Hit or Miss: The industry goes flippin' nuts. Seriously, you know it was an interesting week when the word "apocalypse" was bandied and it was only slightly an exaggeration. Add to the Great Global PS3 Fail the insanity that went down at Infinity Ward, and it was as though the Great Reckoning of Our Time was finally upon us. Luckily for me, I love reckonings.

Oh, also this week: Portal 2 was announced and people were allowed to be gay on Xbox Live.

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 I take a break from the tedium of midterm exams to bring you this fine edition of the Community Spotlight. I don't suppose any of you would like to take my Japanese exam for me? I can pay you absolutely nothing for your trouble and may resent you if you tarnish my precious 100 percent in the class. But if you're game, the offer stands.

Jeffery Michael Grubb starts with the results of his Frogger high score challenge, which weren't easy to collect thanks to my ever-so-helpful recommendation of a version of Frogger that erases its scoreboards every day. Chris Cosmo Ross is next with a horrifying depiction of a sociopathic game store owner's assault of a minor and slobbering lunacy about Final Fantasy 13 on the 360. Mohammad AlHuraiz keeps the bad decision train a-rolling with his account of gaming in the United Arab Emirates.

Patrick Ryan Gan examines why certain styles of gameplay eventually fade from popular gaming, and shows how the days of JRPGs as we know them may be numbered. Finally, Derek Lavigne calls upon the Bitmob community to help him choose a game to play. Lie to him, it's the only way to force him to make the right decision....

Bitmob High Score Challenge: Frogger Results
By Jeffrey Michael Grubb
If you're on edge about the results of Jeff's recent Frogger high score challenge, you can relax. The numbers are in, and despite my best efforts, I didn't even rank. You can check out who scored the best and get in your late entries for the next contest: the Facebook game Word Challenge. You can tell I had no part in the game selection process this time, because, unlike Frogger, scores are easy to report and save!

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Quick show of hands: How many Bitmob community members will be able to make the nerd comedy show/Bitmob Meet-Up tonight in San Francisco, CA? Please let us know in the comments below.

I need to know how many free gifts I should attempt to bring to hand out to you guys. But I have a feeling we won't have as good of a turnout due to timing, spring break, and lighter-than-usual wallets (don't forget our discount Bitmob promo code, though) -- which means those that do show up will have a better chance at getting something cool!

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Editor's Note: Frank again reminds us that video games can have a positive influence on the world. I agree with him, and I hope he continues this series. - Jay

If you asked most people to write down their opinions of the average gamer, the word charitable would probably not be on that list. However, this perception may soon change. Video-game  charities pop up every day, and the amount of money they donate is far from insignificant.

For an idea of how widespread video-game charities are becoming, all you need to do is head towards Google. A search for the phrase 'video game charity' currently shows 19,100,000 results. While many of these hits point to articles such as this one, you don't need to look much further than this very site to see solid evidence that game charities have become pervasive.

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Editor's note: Daniel's walk down memory lane is a brilliant beginning to a new meme on Bitmob. To join in the fun, write about your own gaming decade and tag it "My Gaming Decade." I'll collect them all in a future post. -Brett 

If you’ll forgive me for saying so, I had a great decade. Each year of the 2000s ended better than the last. I was reminded of this when I read Stephen Totilo’s brief recap of his “gaming decade” on Kotaku. Inspired, I present to you a summary of my gaming decade:

2000: I discovered the magic of console modding. My modded NeoGeo was largely a novelty, allowing me to access the DIP switches and uncensor certain fighting games, but my modded Dreamcast became my gateway to imported games from Japan. I’m certain this prolonged exposure to a language I couldn’t understand piqued my interest in Japanese, convincing me to take a night class that fall.

2001: Those lessons inspired me to visit Japan for the first time, where I fell in love with...a Golgo 13 sniper arcade game. Whereas most gun games cast you as a cop, giving you an implicit mandate that your on-screen targets are dangerous criminals, Golgo 13 -- Japan’s favorite professional hitman -- has no such ethical considerations. When the game asked me to snipe a woman’s high-heeled shoe so she’d fall down a stairway to her death, I didn’t even blink. I had never played such an amoral game before.

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Gaijin Games should sponsor a marathon to promote Bit.Trip Runner...and put all sorts of obstacles on the course for people avoid.

Video Blips:

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