With Portal 2 looming on the horizon, I thought it would be fun to promote an article that ruminates on the valuable lessons Valve has taught us.
(This article contains spoilers for Half-Life, Half-Life 2, and Portal.)
Every video game has something to teach us. Starcraft teaches us resource management. Oregon Trail teaches us about frontier life and cholera. Tetris teaches us about Russian folk songs and how to best utilize limited space. When a studio develops multiple titles, their products often share many elements. Valve, a developer known for creating engaging single-player experiences, is no exception. These are the top five lessons I learned while playing their games.
5. Melee away!
The Holy Grail of melee weapons, the fabled crowbar
Who needs guns when you have blunt objects galore? From swords to guitars, you can use pretty much anything as a weapon in a Valve game. And honestly, in my experience, melee weapons tend to do just as much damage as guns -- if not more. Why bother scavenging for ammo when the ultimate weapon has no need for it?
4. Zombies
Which would you rather fight?
If I have learned one thing from Valve's entire catalogue, it is that the end of the world will probably involve zombies in some form or another. Whether we're facing slow, twitchy parasite-controlled zombies or hordes of fast and angry corpses, we are going to have a lot on our hands when the end of the world arrives. So start practicing with that auto-shotty now. You’re going to need to be a crack shot to get through it alive.
3. When in doubt, crawl your way out
"Now I know what a TV dinner feels like." - Die Hard's John McClane
The Left 4 Dead crew does it. Gordon Freeman is famous for it. Heck, even Chell does it once or twice. When you have come to a dead end, and it doesn’t seem like there is anywhere else to go, look for an air vent. These multi-use tunnels are the perfect size for you to make a quick escape, and they always seem to lead you to where you want to go. But don’t forget your flashlight!
2. Nothing is as it seems
Never trust a robot, especially one with a bunch of balls hanging off of it
Some people just aren't worthy of your trust. When Gordon Freeman first meets the G-Man in Half-Life, his appearance basically screams subterfuge. And look what happens. We later find out that Gordon is his pawn in a game of interdimensional chess. The same goes for GLaDOS, the malevolent A.I. running Aperture Labs. She leads Chell on a wild goose chase “for science,” promises her cake, and then tries to kill her. Stay on your toes, and don’t fall prey to these deceptive entities. They will only cause you grief.
1. Keep your friends close
"Friends walk together, pop and lock together." - Flight of the Conchords
If you run off by yourself in Left 4 Dead, you pretty much have a death wish. You need to work with your teammates in order to survive. Gordon Freeman knows this as well. Though the scientists and security guards in the first Half-Life were expendable, he saw the error of his ways in the game’s sequel and recruited the aid of the beautiful Alyx Vance. Chell is alone throughout her first adventure. But at the start of Portal 2, she makes an unlikely friend in the form of a personality sphere named Wheatley.
When the end of the world is nigh, call your closest friends and prepare for the worst. At the very least, you’ll have somebody to berate for causing your demise as the zombies are eating you all alive.
