Alright, I'll say it: Middle-earth needs less melancholy elves and more blood spatters. I can feel my inner geek squirm at the prospect, but come on...a man has needs.

Video Blips:

• This trailer for The Lord of the Rings: War in the North could use a heavy-metal guitar riff to accompany all the slow-mo effects. At least the abundance of severed limbs is a stark indication that this isn't your grandpa's Lord of the Rings.

Continue after the break for an inspiring speech by Optimus Prime in Transformers: Dark of the Moon, the "we don't need no stinkin' bulldozers" destruction of Red Faction: Armageddon's multiplayer, and cute demons-turned-cannons in Slam Bolt Scrappers.

• The bad news: Transformers: Dark of the Moon is a movie game. The good news: High Moon Studios (Transformers: War for Cybertron) is behind it. I didn't realize Optimus Prime could get so philosophical about war; I've always seen him as a walking truck that's pretty good at punching other robots.

• Red Faction: Armageddon's Ruin mode doles out points to whoever can chain the biggest destructive combo. It doesn't speak much about the Mars colony's structural integrity if a psychotic-looking man wielding a giant hammer can effortlessly cause so much chaos.

• Slam Bolt Scrappers' intriguing premise apparently involves turning tiny flying demons into blocky turrets. I guess I'll throw this into my "things to do while drunk" checklist.