Editor's note: Phew! Just made it.... What's the point in having a monthly breakdown of a laundry list of releases if we don't post it until the second week in? Anyway, Jeremy takes the mounds of press and hype surrounding March's RPG releases and cuts them down to easily digestible -- and informational -- morsels. -James

Role-playing-game fans live in a wealth of riches these days. The genre receives entries from all corners of the world and with different styles. This can make it hard for gamers to makes sense of the multitude of releases. But take heart! This monthly column breaks down each month's RPG releases, including gameplay descriptions and word on the street about a game's quality.

It seems March is the new November, especially for RPGs. A ton of significant releases are hitting store shelves this month, not the least of which are new entries into two long-running franchises. It certainly is an exciting time to be an RPG fan, so let’s have at it!

The Main Event:
Final Fantasy 13 (PS3/360)
Release Date: March 9

Let’s face it: The release of a new mainline Final Fantasy is essentially a national holiday for JRPG fans. North America’s most beloved and progressive franchise in the genre always attempts to be at the forefront of narrative and gameplay trends, and this entry is no different. Fans are already hotly debating the way the title streamlines many RPG tropes. The game is extremely linear both figuratively and literally. Square has scrapped traditional towns for the most part and have completely excised seemly sacred elements that don’t fit in to the game. While many see this shakeup of traditional JRPG values as blasphemous, it also illustrates how stuck in a rut the genre is. Besides, streamlining worked wonders for Mass Effect 2, so why not here? Add that to what is said to be the most exciting Final Fantasy battle system yet, and we have may have yet another fresh take on the genre from the industry leader. That said, fans haven’t historically taken to drastic changes in the franchise. Final Fantasy 12 was another fresh take on the formula, and that installment polarized fans. Will 13 do the same?

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Editor's note: Inspired by used books, Chase has an interesting idea on his hands. But I fear that it's implementation wouldn't unfold exactly as he imagines. The hint system of Demon's Souls generally works because all available messages consist of preset text. Left to their own devices, I think too many players would succumb to the Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory. Despite Demon's Souls safeguard, the misuse of "sticky white stuff" is evidence enough for me. -Rob

I like to read books. I don’t do it often enough -- as evidenced by Atlas Shrugged, a collection of Edgar Allan Poe short stories, The Basic Kafka, and plenty more titles all gathering dust on my shelf -- but I try.

My favorite things about books -- that are, sadly, fading away due to devices like the Apple iPhone and Amazon Kindle -- are the abilities to write in the margins and look through the footnotes.

I love to pick up an old, dusty book and see into someone else’s mind by reading his comments. It’s like a mini time capsule. Unfortunately, this is a feature games haven’t really incorporated.

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The media is abuzz with the Infinity Ward & Activision spat -- but let's not forget about more serious issues to address.

News Blips:

Former Infinity Ward (Modern Warfare 2) heads Jason West and Vince Zampella have filed a lawsuit against Activision. The lawsuit states that both individuals were terminated from employment before they were supposed to be paid significant royalties earned while under the Modern Warfare 2 contract. West said that he and Zampella were "shocked" by Activision's actions over the past days. I think Zampella put it best when he said, "After all we have given to Activision, we shouldn't have to sue to get paid." [PR Newswire]

Sony is developing a new smart phone capable of downloading and playing PlayStation games. The new device is one of many in Sony's upcoming line of portable gadgets -- including an iPad-like multifunction device -- that aims to challenge Apple's kung-fu grip on the handheld market. Let's hope that Sony doesn't follow Apple's aesthetic principles by releasing an oversized PSP. [Wall Street Journal]

Ubisoft has quashed rumors that its new DRM system has already been cracked. Reports of the just-released Silent Hunter 5 appearing on torrent websites without the now infamous always-online requirement are "false" according to the publisher, who added that "while a pirated version may seem to be complete at start up, any gamer who downloads and plays a cracked version will find that their version is not complete." But the real humor lies within the instructions for the cracked game: "Install game and copy crack, it's that simple!"  [CVG]

Zipper Interactive is developing SOCOM 4 after re-acquiring the rights to the franchise.  The new entry into the series will boast 32-player online battles. As for their recently released MAG, Senior Community Manager Jeremy Dunham assures gamers that Zipper is still "fully committed" to supporting its PS3 audience. As if we weren't already under a huge glut of military shooters. [PlayStation Blog]

Got any hot news tips? Send 'em over to tips@bitmob.com.

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Editor's note: Too many titles are content rest on their laurels when it comes to character development. Daniel argues that instead of constantly shuffling us from action scene to action scene, developers should spend more time giving us intimate depictions of the characters they present. -James

I opened my Heavy Rain review by noting that one of my favorite parts of the game is something that would be completely boring under normal circumstances. Despite that (or maybe because of it), it’s a thing that is sorely missing in games.

The scene in question occurs right after the prologue. In it, the main character, Ethan Mars, spends an evening with his son. You can let him sit there and watch TV while you have a beer, or you can look at a schedule of tasks and set him to dinner, homework, and bed.

This is exactly the kind of situation that I’ve heard a lot of people say they don’t want to see in games, but I think it’s necessary -- when it's done right.

One of Heavy Rain’s biggest assets over the usual game narrative is how it doesn’t hesitate to put players through the mundane parts of everyday life. While an NPC washes up in your apartment, you might fry her some eggs. Maybe mother is resting in bed for a minute, so you put the baby to sleep.

None of this stuff actually adds to the gameplay or the major parts of the storyline. All it does is help better illustrate the characters and their world. By spending a day in his home with his family, you get a better picture of who Ethan is, which hopefully makes it easier for you to connect with him. Try to count how many video games you can name that have protagonists you actually empathized with. Probably not too many.

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Editor's Note: I thought that I already held video games to high standards. After reading Cameron's article, I looked at some of my own work and realized I was guilty of using the "for a video game" qualifier too. I agree with this premise; we should start examining video games critically and not just in comparison to other games. - Jay

Video games comprise the only medium which serves as its own caveat. It's rare that critics explicitly qualify their praise with “...for a video game,” but they imply it whenever they let games off the hook for failures that would be inexcusable in other media. We have to stop doing this if we want games to get better. Video games don't exist in a vacuum. When we act as if they do, we perpetuate the myth that they're intrinsically inferior to other art forms. By refusing to raise our standards, we reinforce the worst stereotypes about video games and the people who play them.

As technology makes it possible to do more and more with games, their artistic deficiencies become increasingly evident. It's kind of like the uncanny valley effect, only for aesthetics. Back in the days when it was amazing that a programmer could get two little guys to run around a screen and shoot at each other, nobody was too concerned about the moral dilemmas those characters might be facing. In the rush to make the guys look more and more realistic, very few designers stopped to think about whether it might be more interesting if, for example, they looked like something out of a Paul Klee drawing. These days, programmers prove to us that they can render people shooting each other in amazing, lifelike detail. From a technological standpoint, that's truly impressive. However, if games can achieve that level of visual realism, there's no reason they can't push themselves in other directions.

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I say the following with the utmost sincerity and with no hint of irony whatsoever: I love the chicken wings at Hooters. And apparently, so does at least one jokester....

On this week's Mobcast, comedian and former 3DO/Sega/Sony PR dude Dave Karraker expressed his similar love for those hot wings, so we decided that we'd make Hooters the destination for Saturday night's Bitmob Meet-Up, right after the geek comedy show -- Cross Platform Comedy 3.0 -- down the street.

This is your last reminder to come join us for some nerd-humor laughs, a few drinks, and a few thousand pieces of meat that happen to be the same color as the waitresses' short shorts. Also: free stuff.

Update: Yes, we'll be giving away free stuff at the after-party. My apartment is overflowing with goodies (games, t-shirts, posters, etc.) that we've been saving for our fans, and I need to unload. East coasters, don't worry -- our own Brett Bates has you covered as well at our meet-up at PAX East. Uh, sorry middle-of-the-country people...but here's a bone for you:

If you help us promote the last two Mobcasts (which featured the comics from Cross Platform), you could win a download code for Borderlands: The Secret Armory of General Knoxx or a free, random game from our pile, which we'll send to you.

Details on the contest and this Saturday night's events (including a promo code for a discount off the show) below.

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Something's wrong with Master Chief's auto-aim, because he can't seem to get his eyes off of this Stormtrooper. Well at the very least, they're both wearing protection [via Kotaku]!

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Editor's note: Think video games are a big waste of time? If so, check out Brian's humorous list of other things many people do that are far more boring and pointless. -James

As gamers, we share a sense of identity. We're all lazy man-children (or tomboys) who sit around in our underwear chugging six-packs of Mountain Dew, so that we can stay awake to beat the game. Besides being lazy, we're all unintelligent, repulsive bastards who burn books in bonfires. And who knows, we may even eat babies.

All jokes aside, any of us with an ounce of intelligence realizes that most stereotypes about video games and gamers aren't true. I mean, we all know that they don't really rot our brains, right? They may occasionally distract us from more valuable pursuits, but they don't dumb us down or turn us in to mass murderers.

Since we're now all aware that video games aren't a waste of time, I'm going to provide you with a list of handy alternatives that'll make your days go by faster than an Olympic skier on a training run. If you're looking for activities that'll truly insult your intelligence, I encourage you to keep reading.

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A few weeks ago, I welcomed a well-loved Game Gear into my collection. This officially completes my set of the main Sega consoles, but the quest for games has only just begun. The only problem is that not much of the system's library really holds up in 2010.

Like this curious selection here [via The Retroist]:

Hmm, no.... These titles don't fill me with confidence. I'm really only after the Shining Force game, but tracking that down is even more difficult than finding a Game Gear with a working speaker -- which I wasn't able to do....

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It's always good to have a friend. Can you match these video-game characters to their loyal companions?

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Somebody take their big PlayStation 3 back in time to a little over 10 years ago and see it's Y2K compliant.

News Blips:

Due to an internal clock bug in non-slim PS3s, many users are unable to sign onto the PlayStation Network or play any games -- even single-player ones -- and some have even lost their trophies. Sony has a list of the various error messages that have popped up and estimates they’ll have things figured out “within the next 24 hours.” In the meantime, the company recommends that non-slim PS3 owners don’t turn on their consoles until the issue is resolved. Follow the PlayStation Blog for updates. I wonder what the error was -- did some developer program 2010 to be a leap year when it wasn’t?

Activision puts a halt to a fan-made sequel to King's Quest. The affected independent development team originally made a deal with Vivendi Universal back in 2005, allowing them to create The Silver Lining as part of a non-commercial fan license. Now Activision, who picked up the rights to the King's Quest license when it merged with Vivendi back in December of 2007, has decided to shut down the operation. Let us have a moment of silence for this (one-of-many) fan projects taken out by the man. [Joystiq]

Game Politics reports on two research groups' conflicting findings on the effect of violent video games on youth. Analyzing 130 existing research reports on the subject, Iowa State University's Craig Anderson and his team concluded that "violent video game effects are significant in both Eastern and Western cultures, in males and females, and in all age groups." Anderson feels that these findings are "definitive." Researchers Christopher Ferguson and John Kilburn of Texas A&M International University, however, released a paper that challenges Anderson's findings by identifying holes in the studies used and claiming a lack of real-world evidence (i.e., more violent video games today but low crime rates among youth). Video games don't make me violent -- researchers that say they do make me violent!

Ubisoft is giving away free copies of the Assassin's Creed 2: Multiplayer iPhone app for the first 48 hours of its release. Afterward (aka Wednesday), the price jumps up to $2.99. Be warned: If you don't like the game, you won't really be able to get your money back. [AppAdvice]

Got any hot news tips? Send 'em over to tips@bitmob.com.

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Comedians Sheila Bryson and Dave Karraker join Bitmob's Dan Hsu and Demian Linn on the latest and greatest episode of the Mobcast.

The group discusses each person's first professional experience in the gaming industry, Nintendo's recent press event, interesting console launches, personal metrics of nerd cred, and which game hunks Sheila finds attractive.

Have a question you want answered? Want to share some important insight with the world? E-mail the crew at letters@bitmob.com.

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If Kratos's weapons are all available at the same time, that means he must store them somewhere on his half-naked body. But where?

Video Blips:

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Editor’s note: When I was younger, "children's games" never earned a spot in my collection simply because they were usually poorly executed. I suspect those experiences have carried over with journalists reviewing games today. And I fear that I won't have the same patience as Matthew to sit through Bakugan with my own son when he's older. I can only hope to instill a decent sense of taste.... -Rob

When I read reviews that are meant for a younger mindset, I cringe. No matter how many times the reviewer says that he’s doing so with respect to the game’s audience, you can tell that just isn’t true. I don’t know whether it’s because reviewers can’t think like a 9-year-old or that they’re just afraid of losing their “hardcore” cred in whatever culture they wrap themselves, but they miss the point every time.

Want to know how to review a game with adorable woodland creatures sporting googly eyes or whatever flavor-of-the-week cartoon character happens to be the current fad? You play the game with a kid.

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You get this spuriously legal product called the iGame [via DealExtreme]:

For around $90, you could have a device that supports a host of files you don't use and handles them 10 times worse than a computer/phone/modded-handheld. What truly sets the iGame apart from most bootleg contraptions is the impressive 4GB of storage and A/V out ports.

The camera is a confusing addition as the unit claims it is 2.0 megapixels, but the spec descriptions on the order page say it should actually read 3.0. I think both these estimates are far too generous.

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This week on Hit or Miss: Nintendo announces some release dates or something (is that a big deal?); Doritos tries to convince us that lending their brand to a "Pro-Gamer Combine" can make the idea of a "Pro-Gamer Combine" not-absurd; Tecmo tries to convince us any pornographic undertones in Dead or Alive: Paradise were totally "unintentional" (large, obvious wink); and Electronic Arts suggests the new Medal of Honor may -- gasp! -- actually be a thoughtful and empathetic examination of real-life combat in a big-budget shooter.

Where the hell do they get off, right?

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Look alive, private! The week's over and we're buggin' out. You know what that means? That's right -- the Bitmob Reviews Spotlight!

Kevin Zhang-Xing steps front and center like a good soldier with his review of Aliens vs. Predator 2. What's the game like? FUBAR! The online servers are offline, the graphics are old, and the game's no longer scary. But how's the nostalgia factor? Scroll down to find out, son.

Thomas Johnson chimes in with another celebrated rivalry. But instead of predatory aliens battling it out, it's Plants vs. Zombies!

Have you ever been bullied in the past? I bet you have, you nerd! Well, now's your chance to get back at the high school jocks who tortured you, because in Bully, you play as one. Richard Moss fills us in.

According to Alex Martin, Kana: Little Sister will blow you mind. Short of being trippy, the Japanese visual novel follows a young girl who is hospitalized for renal failure. Sounds weird, doesn't it?

Lastly, Ben Maltz-Jones shares his opinions on Comet Crash, a downloadable game available on the PlayStation Network.

So square yourselves, gear up, and get to the choppa -- you're now entering the Spotlight!

Aliens vs. Predator 2 - 9 Years Later
By Kevin Zhang-Xing
Almost a decade has passed since most of us last occupied the blood-soaked boots of Corporal Harrison. Without a functional multiplayer component or the same graphical awe, how does Aliens vs. Predator 2 fare after so many years?

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It's pretty obvious that the cameras on the Nintendo DSi are going to be used for any number of kids games. Take pictures of you and your friends, put those pics on drawings you've made or in an already-released game -- the easy uses for the new camera on our favorite Nintendo portable game system are probably nothing to get too excited about. That is, until you see what Japan is getting in the form of downloadable content next week [via Boing Boing]:

Hidden 3D Image: There It Is! is simple-looking kids game but the head-tracking it uses is truly a sight to behold. Even arcades and current-gen home systems have yet to really utilize this quasi-3D effect (not counting what this guy has done). The implications for pornography alone is staggering. Just saying...

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Let's hope this General Knoxx thing turns out better than Mad Moxxi....

Video Blips:

• Those Geabox guys sure know how to make a trailer. I have no idea what that narrator lady was even talking about in this Borderlands: The Secret Armory of General Knoxx DLC teaser, but I am in. [GameVideos]

Continue after the break for an iPhone-ified Street Fighter 4, a Metal Gear: Arcade trailer, a peak at some of the more cunning moves in Red Steel 2, and a preview of the new Army of Two: The 40th Day DLC.

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Maybe saying that Final Fantasy 7 remake is "unrealistic" is Square Enix's way of challenging fans to write them even more letters demanding that they do it. At least, that's how it'll probably be interpreted.

News Blips:

Speaking to TechDigest, Final Fantasy 13 Producer Yoshinori Kitase recently commented that a Final Fantasy 7 remake looks "pretty unrealistic." If conditions were such that Square Enix could make the game within a year -- with graphics akin to the latest release in the series -- then "we'd very much like a go at it!" says Kitase. He estimates, however, that it would take "three or four times longer than the three and a half years it has taken to put this Final Fantasy [13] together." OK, so probably no fancy FF7 remake -- but how about a portable version? Please?

If you didn't get into the Starcraft 2 beta, Kotaku reports that there's still hope! Several hustlers who attended Blizzcon 2008 are currently auctioning off their Starcraft 2 beta key cards (plus a code for a polar bear mount in World of Warcraft) that they obtained from the event for an average of $300 on eBay. Yikes! If you still just have to play, might I suggest collecting donations from around the office/dorm, and then everyone can take turns playing?

The Game Developers Choice Awards at this year's Game Developers Conference in San Francisco is set to present the Lifetime Achievement Award to John Carmack of id Software. The game programmer is most famous his role in popularizing the first-person-shooter genre in the 1990s with titles such as Wolfenstein 3D, Doom, and Quake. Previous winners of the award include Sid Meier, Shigeru Miyamoto, and Will Wright. I would like to personally thank Mr. Carmack and id for playing a hand in desensitizing me to virtual violence early on in my youth. [Destructoid]

Borderlands: The Secret Armory of General Knoxx DLC drops this Tuesday for Xbox Live Arcade (Thursday for PlayStation Network/PC). Fans can expect to find a huge new area (almost two times the size of The Zombie Island of Dr. Ned); new, ultra-rare weapons; and a level cap that now sits at 61. Damn, I remember when back in the day, if you wanted to max out a character to level 99 in your game, it didn't cost you anything extra. Crazy huh? 

GameStop is having their "biggest trade event ever," offering customers an extra whopping 50% on "every trade." Normally I'm not one to encourage trading in video games to GameStop for chump change, but if you must, now would be the best time to do so. At least with this promotion, the return you get on the games you relinquish won't be super depressing but actually almost fair. [Joystiq] 

Got any hot news tips? Send 'em over to tips@bitmob.com.

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