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Bowser's Secret Plan
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Monday, April 26, 2010

Read this article at: http://www.pixeljumpers.com/pixelfeed/2010/5/9/bowsers-secret-plan.html

Most of us are familiar with Super Mario Bros. The original, which focused on gameplay aspects such as jumping on Goombas and feeling more powerful after taking your dose of magic mushrooms, included very little story. Mainly all we know about the story is that Bowser, for some reason, has kidnapped the Princess. Why would a giant, fire-breathing beast with a turtle shell want to kidnap a beautiful human princess such as Peach? Being a male human with natural feelings of lust, I can only assume what Bowser plans to do with Princess Peach. Of course, since this is a game targeted at a wide audience, Nintendo isn’t going to include any references to interspecies breeding.

In the original Super Mario Bros., we travel through eight worlds, distracted only by a Bowser clone in each world’s castle until we finally reach the real Bowser. We defeat Bowser and rescue the princess and all is well for the rest of time. Or at least until Super Mario Bros. 3 when Bowser decides to kidnap her again. This time, instead of fighting Bowser clones at the end of each world, we are introduced to Bowser’s kids. What?! Bowser’s kids? Where did they come from? Peach must have been really busy during that first kidnapping considering there are seven offspring of Bowser. With no mention of a mother of these seven Koopa Kids, we can assume she would be angry at the fact that Bowser continuously kidnaps the princess of the Mushroom Kingdom. I don’t blame Bowser for seeking other options, though. Any female Koopa, especially if she looked anything like Bowser, would not be attractive at all.

Aside from Peach being beautiful, it makes me wonder why Bowser would choose her out of all other human women. Well, it must be because of her social standing as the princess of the Mushroom Kingdom. Bowser being the power hungry beast he is, he would naturally want his offspring to be of royal blood. Another Koopa female just won’t satisfy Bowser. Bowser only wants the best for his children. This must be why they each have a castle to themselves. Bowser must have a purpose for wanting to create royal offspring. All the pieces lead me to believe that Bowser is trying to create a secret army so he can take over the Mushroom Kingdom.

Although the Super Mario series has been known to focus more on gameplay than story, Nintendo does include minimal story to the series. The Koopa kids have become iconic to the series almost as much as Bowser himself. The fact that Bowser keeps kidnapping the Princess makes fans wonder whether Bowser will ever settle down. Only future installments of the Super Mario franchise will tell, but next time you play Super Mario Bros. take this piece of speculation into consideration.

 
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Comments (3)
10831_319453355346_603410346_9613365_6156405_n
April 26, 2010


Interesting angle -- makes me wonder what other sordid affairs could be going on behind the scenes ;)


Default_picture
April 27, 2010


I used to having a running joke with my friends in which I'd say that Peach is secretly having an affair with Bowser and that she wanted to be kidnapped. A while later, Super Mario Sunshine came out. A ways through the game, Bowser Jr. makes his debut, turns to Peach and exclaims "Momma!!"



My friend and I exchanged glances and I couldn't help but scream, "You whore!!! I knew it!!!"





Could you imagine Peach giving birth to that thing? The spikes on his shell.... yowch.


Dan__shoe__hsu_-_square
April 29, 2010


Could be the same evolutionary thing that makes King Kong have a thing for human blondes....


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